Live Your Most Delicious Life Now, Here’s How

Imagine for a moment if you stopped getting ready to get ready to do that thing that you say you want to do in your life. 

Have you done that on some small or large scale..? 

Held yourself back, done all the other stuff in order to finally, one day, do that thing you feel called to do? 

….I know I sure have. From busy work to overthink, it’s a pandemic more vicious than the one we are currently surrounded by. 

The claws of this dis-ease come from within… from how we see life, think about ourselves, feel about our situation.

Whether it be washing the laundry instead of placing those sales calls…

Cleaning the entire house, even re-organizing the entire pantry, instead of writing that website copy…

Investing in another course, product, class so you can get ready to do that thing you feel so called to do but believe you aren’t yet qualified enough to even start

That book you want to write
but have yet to pen a single chapter, page, word…

The one you think about,
even talk about publishing…
one day…

What if we have it all back-ass-wards?

What if the very act of taking that first step forward is actually the thing that gets you ready? 

What if qualification happens when you start?

Yes, there are some fields where you don’t practice your whip-stitch on a living heart without some clearcut training, education and licensing even… 

Does one even do a whip-stitch on a heart? Hmmm, tipping my chin with my purple pen, thinking back to Dr. Christina Yang on Grey’s Anatomy, as that about sums up my surgical know-how… 

By choice. 

But unless your dream is in a career that calls for life-and-death skills, decisions in the moment that are based on a bank of learned techniques that you must master…

More qualifications are not the answer to what ails you.

What if all you’re doing is placing yourself in the spin cycle, on repeat, wasting time getting ready…to get ready…

Because you are afraid. 

Terrified you might fail. 
Horrified you might succeed – once, then what? 
Worried you might be judged.
Scared you may be found lacking.

Petrified that you may fall flat on your face. Splat. 

Imagine if all you need do is simply cut through the crap of Excuse Land and do the thing you feel called to do.

How many dresses do you really need to try on before going on that date? 

No, girlfriend, I’m serious! 

What if you knew yourself so well, loved yourself so flipping much, that you felt solid, comfortable, perfect in anything you put on? 

Because let’s face it, 
you didn’t wait to look perfect 
when you were an infant 
spitting up and blubbering nonsense
from your crib or bassinet 
or safely cuddled in your mother’s arms. 

You didn’t wait to be qualified 
or even taught properly 
before you took that first 
unflattering crawl,
as a wee, little one, 
now did you? 

Even if you don’t remember it, 
you did it, friend,
Without waiting for permission. 

Because you didn’t go from rolling on your back to running marathons in one leap or bound. No matter how badly you want to be a SuperHero. 

Words are my SuperPower, I so get you! 

And chances are, everyone thought that crawl of yours was utterly amazing, even if it did potentially start off shaky as hell and end in falling-failure.

When we can let go of three misconceptions our lives become so much easier and more enjoyable, in my most humble opinion.

And this is what I’ll be dishing on during next week’s Wednesday Words.
So make a date with your fine self and calendar your read time now.

And hey, sunshine, if you know it’s time to stop getting ready and start doing, book your coaching call with me today because it’s all about who you are JOYfully being as you start a-stepping…

Isn’t it time you step into your purpose, your passion, your truth today? Just saying!

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Photo Credit: Jukan Tateisi @tateisimikito

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One Hour Can Transform All

Video Share: Kicking Perfect, The Poem

If you’ve been waiting to do that thing you’re called to do STOP IT.

This original share, of my first lyrical piece, was two years ago...Two years! It was during my first round in a Transformational Coaching Program, more on that to come, that literally shifted the ground under my feet and turned my life upside down.

In a delicious way. And the effects/affects are still a-happening…

See, I'm just now stepping out
and sharing my-fine-self
(yes, tooting my own dang horn, why not?!)...
and these words.

I’ve been one toe in
sharing up till now,
nearly two years ago
And finally have hit my mark,
My knowing that it’s time to dive in – 
with a full-belly flop
or swan-dive grace,
it matters not.

Originally published back in May 2020 but recorded/written February 7, 2019 and uploaded to a room of 148 souls… this moment in time was my very first step out into the real me.

One I’m so glad I captured on film
(yep, old school girl and I still miss it!)
and can now share with you
as I become crystal clear in my calling
(as you can witness in this week’s Wednesday Words share).

See I've always been a writer just hidden in plain sight.

Working from the shadows as a delicious ghost...

Sound familiar, Dear Hider?
Dimming your light…
Toning it down…
Not shining too bright?

Yet, how can I coach my clients to their greatness,
to write their best words,
to find their amazing voice,

if I don't first shine my light - and blaze a trail as me.

Not some pasty, watered-down, lukewarm version who simply is here to please.

It's past time you decided to shine, is it not?

When you're ready, I've got your back... press play to see that we all start somewhere...

And if you want to see the shift two years can make, come join The JOY Family and see the TODAY version of this lyrical work in full-living (video) color…

Plus, so much more.

Consider leaving a comment below and if this message, this video impacted you in any way, consider that it may also move those you know.

Give it a heart and share it today on your social channels by grabbing clicking the “share” link below. You can even copy/paste these words…

I just watched this video and wanted to pass it along because it’s that powerful. If you’ve got four minutes and want to sink into something delicious while you sip that coffee, tea or take a moment of pause, this is just the thing to put a smile on your face and maybe even make you think. I sure did!

And when you’re ready to let your creative side out, schedule a coaching call today. It’s your time to know you are good enough now to be heard, seen and read, if that is your most delicious dream.

💜

OMG, I Am A…

If you’ve ever been in the spin of doing,
of pleasing,
of following,
of striving,
of learning,
of over-thinking,
analyzing every-little-thing…
I feel you.

I was you…

It’s a habit, a pattern, a web that might just have repetitive layers.

These Wednesday Words are all about what happens when the spin stops.
The lightbulb clicks on with blinding clarity

And the need to see,
understand,
plan down-to-every-single-detail,
that path forward,
is no longer needed…

These words are the opening to such freedom….
Read on if you want some of that…
Because it’s seriously
Delicious.

OMG, I Am A…

It just hit me like a ton of bricks, 
A two-by-four upside the head, 
My coaches’ of course, Jill
ringing like the church bells of my soul.

I am a writer.
I am a f-cking writer. 
Newsflash, I am a damn good, bestselling, award-winning writer. 
An author with creds.
A Word Doctress with soul. 
A m-ther-bleeping badass wordsmith wielding a purple pen

I am a gifted, g-ddamn writer.
And I’ve been burying that
in doing a sh-t ton of other things. 

I have closeted myself in shoulda, woulda, coulda
And wasted precious time
doing stupid sh-t
in order to do that thing
I am here to do.
Write.

Head-meet-desk-hard.

Chasing shiny things, 
Following some gurus words.
Funnel this. Funnel that.

When really it was all about 
“Move b-tch, get out the way, get out the way, b-tch, get out the way!”

Leave it to Ludacris, a rapper turned actor, to sum in up one repetitive line. 

I have been my own worst enemy 
Doing all the things
so that one day, soon
I could focus
on that which matters. 

And it’s time I get out of my own damn way and focus on what matters now.
Because now is the only time I’ve got. 
What about you?

Do you hear me whisper-shouting your name?
If you’re here, it’s for a reason.

Are you too a closeted-creator?

 
A one day, 
when the time is just-right 
and all-the-things align, 
planning to spread your wings 
and be the you –
you were born to be?

I’ll go first. 
I’ll confess
As I’ve heard it’s good for the soul.

But more than confess, 
I commit to stopping the madness that I’ve resided in.

Spun, like a fine web of silk…
Beautiful, intricate, delicious-even
but imprisoning just the same. 

For me, I’ve put off my words, writing…
Nothing but write, publish, 
write, publish

And yet, I have roped myself into believing I needed to learn all the things.

To do the ABCs of marketing, 
the 123s of social media, 
the follow-this-leader, 
Listen to that-voice, 
Master this and that, 
Invest in this greatest, latest thang

Until I can
ring that shiny bell 
over and bloody over again 

So twisted in knots 
I don’t even recognize 
my damn self. 

And I don’t. 

Recognize parts of me that were once friend 
yet now seem more stranger-foe. 

That striving, struggling, focused on all the doing
The cleaning up of all the things
The cutting back of that massive web
Instead of just be-ing me.

The BadAss JOYful Writer who writes all-the-words with a purple pen.

That side piece, left-over version of me,
Reared her fake head,
trapping me in patterns
of do this then that so you can then be you.

Head. Desk. Ouch. 

Even isolated and alone for 2020,
Working on my-fab-self,
only recently lonely, 
while the world burned 
and seethed 
and a virus spread like wildfire,
I allowed myself to be reinfected.

The striving
The perfecting
The doing this so I can finally do that
The either-or chaos that used to be me. 

See, the virus has always been one within me. 

One of not listening to the voice that screams 
Write, damn it, Jill, write. 

Even my mentor recently said, “Your stories. People love your stories.”

And my coach often says, “People need to hear you, Jill. To read your words. People need your JOY.”

Yet, it was just last week while on a marketing call, where I was listening to the very knowledgeable speaker tout dos and don’t of sales, that I got a queasy feeling in my gut. 

A moment of such feels that my first thought was “uh-oh, did I eat something bad?”

Turns out I did not. 
Eat something off…

I was hearing something off for me. 

So not aligned with my values, my core
Who I was meant to be being
But was too busy avoiding. 

See, at some point, it’s high-past-time to stop listening to all-the-damn-voices and tune into mine. 

And that’s what happened to me this morning 
As I swept my floors.

The repetitive action
being in a trance-like state
that opens me to receiving
that which I truly need to hear. 

Yep, trippin’ without the use of narcotics and the side benefit of a clean-ass floor. 

It’s not that the marketing expert didn’t have vital information to share and wasn’t spot on. 

It’s simply that the message wasn’t on point for me, in this moment. 

It was an awakening to where is my attention?
My focus?

Have you had that feeling?
That knowing in your gut, your heart? 

Some unexplainable spot 
that’s out of your head, 
Your mind,
Not a reasonable thought 
but you know is on-the-mark?

When I feel that way and don’t listen, that’s when my life goes tits-up. 

Imagine, if all you need to know is within. 
Because that’s the damn-skippy-straight truth, yo.

When I listen to that voice, I don’t go wrong. 

And that voice is screaming at me
loud and proud and clear
as a just Windex-ed,
twice
looking-glass. 

Write. Writer. Write. 

So I hereby commit to just that. 
And because I know some other creative out there

A being who’s perhaps stuck in a non-creative corporate job

Or been wondering how to make a buck with their art 
while still hearing that old tired voice of someone, 
way back when saying, 
get a real job first…. 

That closeted-artist is asking
What does that even look like to just write, writer, write? 

And that’s a mighty-fine-question because we’re trapped in a society that rewards doing instead of being. 

So here’s my answer. 

For me write.writer.write means
Stop all the madness. 

For me the madness is 
all the things that
one day
will allow
me to write 
yet keep me from writing
now. 

All the creating, all the spinning of plates, all the mindless learning that’s without purpose and intention. 

Because friend just like abundance follows JOY,
a secret key to life
is using your intention and your will.
When you do, life is magically delicious.

So I now burn it all down to focus on the following:

Write A Book

(Or Three, I Like Things In 3s)

If you’ve listened to me, followed me or worked with me, you know I write 2,500 words each morning – typically before the sun shines. I love this way of showing up and now I’m switching it up.

These words have always been just mine.

Meaning anything else I need to write is written on top of these 2,500 words.

Most of my morning word-count never sees the light of day.

And yes, Dear Becks, (my delightful, bossy agent), I’m sure many of them could be strung together into a book or twelve. 

But now, the mix is this – 1,000 of those morning words, plus anything else I choose to write in the day will be book-specific. 

BOOM!

See, to me, my 2,500 morning word-count, five days a week was learning how to perfect one punch.

To master the art of writing, of voice.
A lesson well learned.

And with more than 20,000,000 morning words written, I’d say mission accomplished. 

So there will be a book released August 8, 2021 and it will be in my own name. You can access the waitlist right here. 

But also look out for more reads from me in 2021...as one book a year…
Hmm, I’m thinking I have more in me now that my focus is on-point. 

Writing Wednesday Words

A weekly blog post where I get to be me, write what I want to write about and perhaps inspire the closeted creative in you. Or just plain rock your world!

Some Wednesday Words are forever-free and some are in The JOY Vault 24-hours after publishing – it’s a bit of a game and we all need more fun (and dare I say, JOY) in our lives, do we not?

So that’s what I am committed to and it feels so dang good!

Plus…

Coaching Closeted Creatives

In the art of knowing Abundance Follows JOY and creating A Most Delicious Life – and that it doesn’t have to be hard…

I have been coaching creatives for more than two decades.
You can read about it here.  

Some of my coaching clients are writers, some are creative only at heart and others don’t even identify with being creative…

But if something I say here in this Love Letter resonates, book a session. 

If it doesn’t, find someone who does speak your language.
I am a firm believer in having a coach.
I have an awesome one.

And also a new believer in boundaries.

And I have just narrowed down,
by half,
the amount of hours I dedicate to coaching.

Why?

Because I am here to
Write. Writer. Write.
And that calling must come first. 

This is what it looks like to burn-baby-burn it-down and get #real.

Teaching A Monthly Masterclass

These JOYful Word Masterclasses range in word-topic and are a delicious way to get my coaching, knowledge, experience and skill as a JOYful writer for an affordable investment, in a group setting. 

And they are a way for me to connect, outside the voices of my characters, and sharpen my coaching blade.

Let’s face it.
I love to coach, teach and write
but writing must come first.

Remember, I am going back to my line of wakening, clarity and the zap of freedom that calls simply – write.writer.write.

When that calling is honored first, all works.
Lean into your knowing,
that voice within
and hear it loud and clear.
It’s there.

I have committed to teaching these Masterclasses the 3rd Saturday of each month this year and I am keeping them on my schedule because they grow me, they are impactful for others and there is a need. 

See, I am learning the power of being committed, which does not mean staying in what makes you miserable because you gave your word, but doing more of those things that build you up. And having the courage to change your mind and burn down that which no longer serves.

This Masterclass is a delicious slow build for me, and a way I can invite creatives to work with me for a steal-of-a-deal because let’s face it my words aren’t cheap. 

Launching A Podcast March 3

A Most Delicious Life Or He Said, She Said

Give me your preferred title vote now, before it’s too late by leaving a comment below. Then get on my Wednesday Words list to be notified first when we go live.  

The reason I am choosing to do this is simple. I listened to the masses and then I listened to the voice within. My voice. The only one that truly matters. The masses need an uplifting voice, stories, encouragement, JOY…

Because let’s get real, people are suffering, feeling isolated, alone, lonely and if my voice, my words can impact just one… than I have won.

Fun Fact: I am a verbal processor and until two years ago, I had no idea. I am also a poet, a writer of prose and what better way to share a message than with a vocal slam. 

Plus, I believe there is a need for a writer’s voice to be heard that cuts through the starving artist mentality and shares that anything is possible, even being a successful creative who makes bank simply by designing his or her own most delicious life. 

See words are everything and you’re using them every moment to create your life…
so you choose “delicious” or not.

A Creative Card

Much like a wild-card, this is my moment of freedom to be me and might be applied quarterly or annually. It’s open to possibility. 

No more needing to publish a quarterly The JOY Magazine because I thought it was a good idea in the heat of one creative moment. Ah yeah, I did that and have four issues actually!

This is my ability to express myself with a series, a short story, a published piece on Elephant Journal like this one or this one or to create social media posts for a month.

Still have a love-hate relationship happening there. Feel free to stalk me.

This might be my creative moment to record a video for My JOY Subscribers or release an audio, one-off program or just work on my damn book or outline the next one. 

The Creative Wild Card is just that wild, untamed – the structured-freedom to do anything I damn well please, even if it’s not aligned with the above five-bulleted-things…

Delicious And Fabulous…Is It Not?

Because suddenly there is freedom in the structure, in the discipline, in the devotion to one thing.

Write. Writer. Write.  

It feels freeing to just do sh-t my way. 

And my sh-t is to write.

Blog posts that might turn into sections or chapters within a book. 
Articles that may inspire a generation and become a series.
Words that resonate…
Inspire
Lead
Bring JOY.

Writing is all about my voice, my way, and for a cold-hard-second I lost that. 

When I am true to me, my words work, they land. 
Empowering.
Serving.
Impacting. 

What about you? 

How freeing would it be and do you, your way…
To stop seeking external approval, 
to end all the learning, 
to begin again… 
Knowing you are exactly where you need to be.

Not to copycat a marketing plan or follow a guru
but to burn all the shit down. 
Shut it off.

And turn up the volume on the drumbeat of you.
Your soul, karma, calling...
Your dharma.

When you stop pedaling another’s bike around the circular track of someone else’s life, your dharma catches up to you… 

It’s found, but only in the in between.

It’s the whisper-shout within, the one that tells me simply

Write.Writer.Write.

This is where I’m at…  

A moment to simply bask in the fact that my focus is one thing and one thing only.

It’s also my SuperPower.

Coming out of The Creative Closet,
my way,
as me,
and doing my thing–
full-stop. 

Will it work?

For twenty-plus years it did. 
And then I got out of my heart and into my head. 

It worked for me, 
writing as someone else, 
closeted but true to me, 
not caring of reviews 
or marketing trends.

Not paying mind to the latest, greatest funneled-path to success. 

Instead, just going with my gut. 
Purple pen-ning my words.
Knowing I was the conduit. 
Simply showing up as me, 
the writer, each and every day. 

And for the nosey soul, when I say burn it down, 
this is what I mean… 
Pressing pause on cleaning things up, 
fixing shit, 
learning all the things…
Waiting to get it right.
Perfecting all the sh-t... 
And instead serving 
With heart. 

An open heart. 

And just recognizing that if it ain’t listed above 
It is none-of-my-concern 
at this time. 

Exhale. Sweet relief. 

I want that for you. 

When you’re ready for the deep sigh of absolute, divine freedom from all that’s got you stuck, spinning, going a 100 miles a minute… 

Get your fabulous self on my coaching schedule or be finally allow the creative-in-you out to play and join my masterclass to start co-creating a most delicious life.

And at the very least, join my Wednesday Words JOYnote train… and make a date to read my words each week… some say they make their day. What will you say?

For access to all my words become a JOY-Subscriber today. 

Simple paths allow for crazy impact. If you want some of that, sink into this message and hear your own inner calling. 

You know your path, isn’t it about damn time you followed it?

When you need support, I have your back.

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One Hour Has The Power To Impact All

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Post Photo Credit: Eyasu Etsub @jphotography2012

Good Girl Or Bad To The Funny-Bone

Dear JOYful One, 

I used to be a good girl. 
Nix that. 
I still am a good girl. 

But for very different reasons.

See, I’m also a bad-girl. 
A bold, rule-breaking, f-bomb dropping, bad-to-the-funny-bone gal. 
And I love it. 

I love the freedom that comes with finally being comfy in my own skin. 

If you can imagine not being good with who you are,
Not feeling enough living in your own skin, 
Gosh, I feel you. 

Maybe you can relate to always being the good one…
Whether an only child or one of many,
to please those in your life. 

Perhaps you followed the letter of the law.
Making straight A-s
Striving and perfecting, 
Aching to receive something. 

A smile, pat on the head, praise, acceptance, love. 

Pause for a beat if that resonates.
Do you remember how that way of being feels?

For me, it was a high of needing to do more,
Be more of what that person who smiled at me wanted.

Changing myself just a tad to please this person.
Twisting myself that way, just a bit, to please that other person.

Until answering the question,
Who Am I Even?
Became impossible. 

Until I was so tied up in knots, I didn’t even recognize me. 

The never-ending spin of being what everyone wanted me to be left me depleted, exhausted and so bloody angry… 

But while that anger, at first, was directed at others in a blame-game, 
It soon became crystal clear this was more a-fuming-mad at me moment that spiraled down into shame, if I allowed. 

Again, take a beat. Does that resonate?
If not, perhaps...

You went that bad-boy (or girl) route
and did all you could to stir-the-pot of your life
Receiving just a dash of temporary JOY, 
When able to poke, antagonize, annoy everyone in your vicinity. 

And in return, you were awarded attention if not praise, acceptance and love. 

While this path was not mine to own, it was the path my characters often took. Those creations I wrote stories about
And conversations I’d have in my head. 

Perhaps you know that way of being, 
lost in what you coulda-woulda-shoulda said 
if only you had thought it at the time.

Replaying a moment over and over on repeat until you’re so exhausted or pissed at yourself that you can’t see straight. 

Man, that was me. 

Working myself up into sick by constantly thinking
if only I’d said this or that 
or been just a bit more of something I was not. 

This way of showing up made me ill as a teenager and perhaps you can relate. With the constant replaying of convos, 
With working yourself up to pissed or sick.
Neither way pays. 

For one the inner turmoil but more importantly the missing out on the now. 
The moment that is. 
The only moment that matters. 

I lost so much time stuck in my head. 
I lost so many opportunities because I was trapped in my emotions. 

And it took pressing pausing, a beat of silence, awareness that in pleasing everyone else I was never going to be free to be me. 

Both ways of being 
Good-girl or Bad-to-the-Bone
have something deeply in common,
a need to belong. 

A need to matter.
A need to be seen.
A point-blank-need for something outside oneself.

And that, that right there, is the downfall of so many who say they want JOY in their life yet all but repel it with every decision. 

For more than 20 years I have been a vivacious, audacious, in-your-face, brilliant, fun, bright and un-f*ck-with-able woman. 

I have closed deals, made bank, impacted people around the world and received praise 

(but not taken the time to receive it nor honor it until recently)

All of this from doing what comes naturally…
Wielding my purple pen of words. 

But not doing it as me, but as an alter ego version of me.
Until recently. 

How can I fully own my own success and celebrate my accomplishments when I hid that I was a successful closet writer?

When I chose not to see that I was a bad-ass and a good-girl?
When I had to don a disguise to be me?

A side of me who broke rules and was a bad-ass-bold-girl who got-sh*t-done. 

Someone I admired, yet never dared show up as for-real, until now. 

Recently, I found absolute freedom in just being me and no longer playing a character-version in my own life. 

Yet, what if it’s common to not show up fully as oneself. 

Playing a dimmed down version.  
Hiding behind all the stories of abandonment, fear of rejection, low self-worth. 

Lacking the self-confidence to know you are great, enough, just as you are.

See, this week, I had a meltdown.
A big one.
A breaking point. 

And it was delicious even in all the ugly crying. 

I’m writing all about it. 

And I want to invite you in.

It’s a JOY-Subscriber Only Read

And it’s vulnerable.
Real.
Honest.

And if you want some of that, you have a choice. 

Become a JOY! Subscriber and receive more delicious words each week.

Either way, I know for a fact that JOY is where it’s at and if you need more acceptance, praise and love in your life, know this. 

You give it to yourself first and receive so much more. 
More than you can even begin to imagine. 

And it all starts with more JOY. 

Here’s my secret, and the reason I am now 
closing deals,
making bank,
impacted people around the world
and received praise as me, not a fake version of me… 

I know in my bones Abundance Follows JOY. 

And that’s a mic-drop-able moment, when you truly know that #truth.

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One Hour Can Transform All

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Facing My Fears – The Tale Of Lilly Anne

I laid down on the cool tiled floors, thankful for the sweater and jeans covering most of my must-have-warmth body.

I had no idea that doing this one little act would be so incredibly impactful.

How a simple task of facing a "fear" could open my world in unimaginable ways, that even now I strive, no struggle to find the best words to paint this divine share...

As literally, to speak, after this moment, was impossible.

And no, this fear conquered had nothing to do with public speaking but everything to do with my perception of people...

And myself...

Dive into this read with me now to see how one moment, one choice can open a door to so much.

JULY 2019

It was a Monday. Busy. Go figure. But this was pre-pandemic when Corona was still served with a twist and a lime.

Best on a beach...

But while in the heart of Miami, the air-conditioned breeze removed all thoughts of tropical warmth and sandy beaches from my mind.

See, I was doing the thing.
That thing I did not want to do...
I was facing a fear.

And of course I chose the most crowded spot. The one were lines formed as people with devices waited for the glass doors to slide open and the Apple-bells to ring.

I laid down on the cool tiled floors, thankful for the sweater and jeans covering most of my must-have-warmth body.

And spoiler alert... I had a blast!

People asked me what I was doing…

I said, “Looking at things from a new perspective.”

A grandfather get help from his son and daughter to lay beside me so he too could look at things differently.

His name was Jose Felipe and we laid side-by-side for 15 minutes, chatting up a storm. 

His grandkids laid beside us. Quietly listening to us and whispering about the ‘weird’ woman.

I learned about his boat ride from Cuba.
About being sent back.
And coming again on a raft.

Wow.

I talked to a couple who asked me if I was afraid of what people were saying about me, laying on the floor.

I shared that people were judging me if I was upright walking past them or laying here ‘crazy’ on the ground. And it didn’t matter...Let them judge.

He liked it.
She freaked.
And this led to more interesting chats.

I had a lady buy me a coffee. Just because. 

Maybe she thought I was tired...?

Two Apple techs came out to give me a rolled up shirt to put under my head.

They shared, one timid and one with glee, that some customers were recording a video of the cray-cray-floor lady.

Didn’t care.
Sweet.
Fun.

A cute 30-something in a suit gave me chocolate from Godiva. I thought it important to share, I was hitched before helping myself to his chocolate.

He laughed and said, lucky him, and gave me the entire box.

The kids and Jose Felipe dove into the tasty treats with me.

A cop asked what I was doing... I shared. 

Then I asked if he liked what he was doing - patrolling the mall. We had a ten minute chat about his hopes and dreams. He wanted to write crime dramas…hmmm. 

Life-changing. For him. For me.

Laying down in the middle of a crowded mall, in front of that busy-as-heck Apple store, brought up so many STORIES and interpretations...and fears.

And Because I Chose To Do It Anyway,
This Happened…

Connections
Conversations
Sharing
Opening Of Hearts & Minds
Vulnerability
Love

And then, when I thought it couldn’t get any better, as the Apple manager and employees actually gifted me items ….

What?!

Believe me, I know. I was blown away but their words, that was the true gift.

A few brave souls shared how I touched them. That they press-paused in their day to stop and talk about what I was doing, why I was doing it and the IMPACT it made on them and the manager.

First, that I was willing to face the fear of public humiliation, which frankly stumped many of them… and if we’re being honest, it terrifies most people, does it not?

Maybe you can relate.

And second, one sweet girl with ink-black braids knelt beside me and said, “I love how you took time for each person who approached you.”

When I asked her why that made her sad, as she had tears in her eyes, she said, “Most people don’t give me the time of day.”

"What do you mean?” I can still feel my frown and that tug on my heart strings.

“Because I look different.”

She was covered in ink, more than just her jet-black hair and showed me by rolling up her long-sleeves.

I didn’t know what to say, so I said the truth. “Beauty comes from within. Those who don’t take time to see you are simply not worth your time.”

Her hug was one now, all but hug-less for going on eleven months, I remember fondly.

(Amazing the little things I miss. And now recognize as so incredibly important.)

Priceless.

But that’s not where this tale ends.
Although it easily could.
Nope… there’s more.

A spa across the way thought I needed a facial.
Either sun damage or from being on the cold floor… [smile]... so sweet.

It so was… 

And Jose Felipe's granddaughter. She floored me.

She handed me the greatest gift…dug out of her very own pocket. Her favorite charm keychain.

The little girl who just a short time ago had used lady and weird in the same sentence and thought I hadn’t understood.

[wink]

This keychain was not a plastic, throw-away kid-item but an expensive thing from Coach.... And, I cried. Not from receiving a dang keychain but from the express, dare I say love, in her eyes.

I cried because it wasn’t until that moment that I realized I hadn’t asked her name… that I had been so occupied with others, while she sat quietly, patiently, attentively beside me…

Waiting her turn.

Lilly-Anne. 

My heart stopped in that moment. I could have sworn, looking back that the world stopped...for just a beat.

I want you to remember something before I go on with this sharing…

I believe that

Everything is Energy…
We choose our path.
We all chose to be here…

These are my beliefs, opinions, although the first is indeed fact.

That said, Let me take you back to a conversation I had once, long ago.

My fiancé more than ten years back, called me early one morning and said, 

I interrupted with “—You had a dream.”

“YES!”

“Me too.”

Silence.

I managed to get out... “I met our daughter–”

“–her name was—”

“—Lilly.”

“YES!” Chris choked up on the other end of the phone. 

Tears were already streaming down my face as I said, “She had—”

“—Ringlets.”

“And they were—”

“—strawberry blonde. Like yours.”

“Yes.” I was full on ugly crying at this point but it mattered not. I could hear the tears in his voice too. 

Chris, a crazy Brit who liked to call me Twit had three boys, 21, 18 and 7 at the time. He never thought he’d have more. Never imagined he’d have a little girl… but there she was… in both our dreams. On the same evening.

And then he was gone. A helicopter crash just two months later.

No Lilly.
But I always had the shared dream.
And that was beautiful. 

You think this tale ends here but no, there is more.

I met my Frenchman in Feb 2011 and we tied the knot in January, almost one year later. He so wanted to have a child and I was hesitant.

He had two already and we were new, fresh, and I was NOT used to being in a relationship…

Hmm, personal responsibility, I made it HARD.

So we’d dream and chat over morning coffee while I “made” him rub my feet (which he LOVED to do). We decided that our “son” would be Edmond Lee after this grandfather and mine, should we have a boy…

And he was determined, if we had a girl, to name her…. 

Anne-Marie…

And I tacked on Sophie, just because it sounded so cool.

Now, it never happened. My fabulous Frenchman and I decided NOT to have Edmond Lee or Anne-Marie Sophie…

Just as Chris and I did not have Lilly…

And yet here she was - the CULMINATION of those conversations.
The incarnation of Lilly-Anne 

And it rocked me to my core. Literally.

Because I did this work
Because I let go of my fear of being judged... 
Because I was open to possibility... 

….I was given a gift.

I met my daughter(‘s) energy.

And she knew it.
I knew it.
And yes, she had ringlets…

No sh*t.

It's SO wonderful to know SHE became a reality, SHE became someone's reality.

Tears flow freely with such ease and JOY and amazement because....

If I had not laid down out of fear of judgment or some such stupid, meaningless story or interpretation....

AND not received that beautiful message!

What a missed opportunity that would have been...

What Are You MISSING
By Staying Trapped In Your
Fear, Interpretations, Stories, Bullshit?

This moment, this exercise showed me so much more than the physical reality we all think is real, is all there is.

It’s nothing. There is so much more.

When I get out of my way…

The UNIVERSE shows me what’s possible.

For me.
And it will
For you.

Shows me the true IMPACT of my actions, my words, my stories... my interpretations.

And the line I go back to daily…
100% Possible.
100% of the time.

And I ask myself constantly –
What’s possible for me in this moment?
What can I learn from this?
How can I grow?

And it serves me, so if that serves you, steal it.
Because literally anything is possible. 

Even a Thanksgiving phone call last year...
Where I bawled afterward like a little baby.

---

It was Lilly-Anne calling to tell me she’s so thankful to have me in her life and how she talks to me when she’s sleeping and knows I have her keychain with me always.

That’s how she finds me… she shared.

OMG!

She then lowered her voice to a whisper and told me a “secret”

And this broke me – in a blessed way I’ll never forget.

She said…You were my first-choice mama but you weren’t ready for me.

OH.
MY.
GOD.

And she was right.
So
Beautifully
Right.

I Share This Tale
So You See There Is So Much More Possible.

And heck, if you’re shedding a tear, know that I am still crying as I type this out.

But it’s tears of possibility.
It’s tears of amazement.

Because today, Lilly-Anne called me again… to wish her other-Mama Happy Gratitude Day.

When will you ready to get out of your way,
Let go of the sh*t stories and step into all that you are?

It’s time…is it not?

Final Update

And remember that cop who spoke to me about those crime dramas he wanted to write. Well, a few months later I had a call with him, as of course I gave him my number while laying on that too-cold-tile floor outside of the Apple store.

I coached him on 3 pointers to start way back in 2019… and he took it all to heart.

He began writing in his spare time and took to writing me a monthly email update.

He told me he’s saving up money to coach with me and simply wanted to keep me in his accountability loop.

He also asked me, pretty forcefully I might add, to start a group program in the New Year so he can do it sooner rather than later.

And guess what?

That cop, he booked that coaching session he said he wanted.

We meet next week and he promises to bring his completed rough draft to the table. Damn, son! Gotta love that.

Like I shared early.

100% is possible. 100% of the time.

Navigating Alone On The Holiday – With Grace.

This piece was first published on elephant journal, a leading online publication with over 10 million unique readers each month.

I sit here allowing the sun to rise 
on another glorious day 
because I choose for it to be so.

Glorious.
Divine.
Delicious.

I could look upon this day 
With sad eyes 
A lonely heart 
A troubled mind
Believing I am alone.

But I don’t
And here’s why.

Today is a holiday. 

But for me everyday is a holiday,
Not simply those dictated by law, custom, tradition,
Or religion.

When you see each day as a
gift
Something in you 
shifts. 

Mathew McConaughey said it recently, while interviewed on The Rachel Hollis Podcast, “We were reminded early on not to take the sun rising this morning for granted. That was a gift, you better damn well be thankful for it.”

Imagine if you never took another 24-hour 
Trip around the sun,
Dreamtime-spin with the stars 
As a given…

But as a #blessing.

What would change with that one little shift of your attention? 

For me, 

Each day is a choice to embrace wholeheartedly
or to bury myself under a mount of patchwork quilts.

And I’ve done both.

Don’t think I haven’t sunk 
down 
down…
So far 
down
I felt the drowning of me.

I’ve been so 
low, 
So cloaked in 
sad 
That the tiles
Beneath my sobbing breaths
Ceased to feel
cold. 

So chilled to the bone 
that getting up,
taking one step 
was my Mount Everest. 

Yet, climb out of that despair I did
And if one can do it
That’s proof positive you can 
As well.

If you are ‘stuck’ in the proverbial deep, dark well of you.

This right here is a knotted-word-rope 
out of your darkness,
into the Sunshine of you.

These words can be your life line. 
Your place to crawl to… 

For I can not crawl for you.

I can not lift you out 
but my words can raise you high.

If you embrace them. 
If you listen to hear them. 
If you desire a new yellow brick road to you.

It’s possible to find so much JOY today…
Any day.

In a crowded room 
filled with those you love-to-hate.

Or solo on your sofa, 
Hot mug of somethang-somethang in hand.

I hug each day
A long-lost friend.

Precious. 
Precarious. 
As though it’s my last. 

Because I choose too.

On this day, I will stop and give thanks, 
Yet, I do this each and every day.

And when I want to try on my SuperPower
I find grace and gratitude and the JOY within. 

Today is a holiday 

And I am alone––
Physically.

But emotionally my cup-runneth over 
Because I love myself. 

Because the Negative Nelly in my mind 
is tied tight with purple ribbons
not allowed out 
to distract-play 
with me. 

That #critical voice
silenced by my wicked JOYful smile.

My knowing that I am enough. 

When you lean into that right there,
You know you are not alone.

Even if no one is near...

Imagine if on this day,
every day,
you made friends 
with your lone self. 

Imagine if on this day, 
every day, 
you spoke to yourself 
with compassion, 
kindness, 
JOY.

To be alone is only lonely if you say it is.

To be alone is a gift that bears the greatest of harvests
When you can stand your own self. 

When you can love every inch of you
Inside and out.

When you can embrace the silence as
a delicious offering

That can bring you 
peace, 
ease, 
even understanding… 

Of just how special you are. 

For you are, or you would not be here. 

You are not a mistake.
This day is not an error.
You, alone, or feeling alone 
Is just as it should be.
Must be.
Need be.

When you see that, 
When you stop pushing on the pull door of life
And sink in… 

All will shift for you. 

When you rise up to what is
See it for your benefit
Not detriment…

All will open wide.

You can hang
your holiday decorations
on the idea-tree of 

I am so alone 

And spiral down.

So
far
down. 

You can light
a new candle
to illuminate
a version of you
perhaps you were afraid
to unwrap…
Till now.

Glorious
Victorious
Amazing is you.

I see you. 

Packaged so perfectly-imperfect.
Stop hiding… 

Stop swimming in despair.

For, if you dare, 
you are
so past ready 
to be 
unwrapped…

By you, yourself, not I.

Are you ready to get to know the gift of you?

Because only when you take a beat, 
A pause, 
A space,
A moment.

Today, perhaps…

And you lean into knowing
Fully,
Deeply,
Truly

That you are a precious gem... 

One of a kind.
Divine. 

Sink into that
On this day
Any day. 

For truly
You are never alone
When you are your own very best friend.

And when you want more insight…

When you’re ready to fully tap into the JOY that is within…
Hear your #truth and sink into a knowing,

Not just an understanding 
that you are enough…

Join me for JOYnotes, a Wednesday Words series, from me to you.

Words, a message, a dance of my alphabet 
Penned in purple ink 
to support you, 
Uplift you,
Shine the brightest of lights upon you
And remind you that you are never alone…
On this day nor any other day.

If this message captured your heart, consider giving it a heart to support these words. Words that you could share with another person right now and make viral.

Leave me a comment if you do, Sunshine, as I want to thank you for being you. 

---

These words where first published on Elephant Journal and have the potential to impact lives in a massive way. See Elephant Journal is an online publication with more than 10 million readers a month.

Yep, a month! That’s a heck of a lotta eye-balls.

So if feel THIS read it empowering, powerful and a full of enough word-magic to share, simply copy/paste the below content and share with others on your social feeds or head there now yourself to heart/share/follow me and access all my there-published-words.

Or feel free to send people directly here to this page, on my word-home.

How you show up today impacts another’s future and your own in ways you can’t even begin to comprehend.

Share JOY today and receive so much more . . .

---

Video Share: What Do You See..?

When things happen in 3s, I pay close attention.

If that's a bit too woo-woo for you, you probably need to stop reading now, because this JOY-train is heading down a path more and more aligned with that side of things... of me.

My love of 3s started with beverages. Noticing them that is. On my desk, you'll rarely find less than three. Coffee, water, green tea. Even if the coffee mug is empty, as I'm not a chain-drinker, it remains until something else is ready to slide into it's third place position.

Judge away or see how numbers work in your world for a moment.

See numbers are the secret, or not so secret language of the universe. All is math.

And to think I once hated math.
Then taught math.
Ah, the irony.

If you aren't aware, I'm a coach. (I was a teacher and well, always will be, but let’s stick with my coaching hat for a moment.)

Have been coaching creatives for (gasp) two decades.

Yep, I'm finally owning my sh*t and speaking up.

Pardon my bluntness, but clearing away the cobwebs I've been hiding behind for most of my life has been a messy, sometimes sticky job…

One of unpacking stories and interpretations and frankly, my very own brand of bullsh*t.

We've all been there, right? Walked through that spider web and gotten the heebie-jeebies... [insert full-body shiver]

Happens to me all the time.

And now I'm paying more attention.

I'm starting to find spiders increasingly fascinating... eight legs, eight eyes, figure-eight body, hello, infinity... not to mention the symmetricalness of those webs...

Did I mention the importance of all is numbers..?

While this JOYnote is not about creepy-crawlies or a math-riddle that leaves you stumped as to why anyone in their right mind would seriously want to know at what time, what speed and where in the world said trains meet...

[Head meet desk over math-worksheet-hell for all parents in all the cities, states, countries around all-the-world]

This message is about an apple.

Yep. Not expecting that one now were ya?

See, I mentioned I've been coaching peeps for 20 some years and this week apples came up three times with three amazing woman, during three separate conversations.

So I decided to write about it for you, today.

[rubbing hands together in delight]

Here's what I asked each of these beauties.

What do you see when you look at an apple?

The answers were delicious in their glossy surface-level at first.

Red. Fruit. Food. Shiny. Snack.

Each answer was perfection. So I asked a follow up question.

What do you see on the inside of the apple?

An amazing athlete who's also a closet songstress said, nutrients.

Brilliant.

My food blogging client, who's writing romance novels and killing-it said, juicy goodness.

Of course! [Insert giggle]

A new to me client, pondering her second book, reflected for a beat and asked, "Is it organic?"

My response. "It can be if you say it is."

She gave a curt nod then said firmly, lunch.

Al-right-y then.

Then I asked each one, Do you know what I see?

Each lady, separately of course as this was not group coaching, but more on that to come in 2021, nodded yes and leaned forward...

[pst, writer in you, this is power of story I'm modeling if you didn't yet catch it]

"I see possibility."

Spoiler alert... my words are in video form today. Press play as I share dive into my answer of just what I see when I look at an apple.

Then be sure to leave a comment below with your biggest take-away.

---

Photo Credit: Константин Маманович @anonsmi

---

Stuffed With Gratitude... Are You?

For those in certain parts of the world this is a time to be give thanks.

Yet, what if everyday was a day to be utterly, turkey-stuffed, profoundly grateful.

This is what I have been forced to sink into this week.

Utter gratitude.

I use that word – forced – specifically,
as I was so addicted to my story of hiding,
playing small,
not being visible,
not (cough) knowing how to step out and be seen.

I finally called bullsh*t on all of it...

Not being visible.
Hiding in plain sight.
Not sharing me without some smoke and mirrors
Or legal layers of protection.

And instead, I focused on doing the thing...

Showing up
As Me,
Unapologetically.

All shifted when I submitted my words just seven days ago to an online publisher with on average 10 million unique readers a month.

Hmm, go big or go home, right?

And it paid off...

One week ago today, I was honored to having my words published on this leading platform, Elephant Journal.

Know what my coach said?
Of course, Jill.

And not only that, the editor reached out directly to share with me that he'd chosen my piece as his weekly Editor's Pick.

Again my coach…
yes, I have one, don't you?
…chimed in with another
Of course, Jill.

When this editor said my words could, should go viral...
that warmed my heart
and I took a beat to receive the message.

Did you catch that?

To fully receive, with an open heart and deep gratitude, takes pause.

Takes a moment of acceptance, reflection, grace and fabulous stillness.

And I got still.
I got quiet with the newness of receiving.
And found it opened something within me...

A most fragile of blooms...
delicate pedals unfolding with sudden, delightful ease...

A tickle of JOY
A smile of delicious ease.

Ahh, yes...
Let it be easy.
And it shall be.

When I allow greatness to flow to me.
And truly allow myself to receive it.

It takes gratitude.
So much giving of thanks for all that is,
all that was,
all that will be...
With no thought to coulda, woulda, shoulda

Nothing but the absolute stillness of this moment.
Breathe it in...the JOY of feeling so thankful for this day, every day...

Today, instead of a post on my blog, please check out this read over on Elephant Journal and consider giving it a heart so more people can find these words.

If you're feeling gratitude in your heart for this message,
consider sharing it on social today right from that site.

You may change someone's life and increase the score so more people can read these words... my words... published as me.

Because it's time my message went vital... with me in plain sight, is it not?

If you agree... spread the word today by sharing that link directly from Elephant Journal... it's easy to do... and leave a comment or two!

Until then Happy Thanks Giving
each and every moment
of every flipping, fabulous day.

---

One Hour Does Have The Power To
Open Doors & Transform Your Life

What If You Are Enough? (How To Flip The Voice Within That Says You Aren’t Enough)

These words are REPOSTED here and are originally published on Elephant Journal — November 18, 2020 — as the Editor’s Pick!

What if I’m not Good Enough?—
How to Overcome this Painful Mantra from our Childhood.

If you love this read or what to spread this message, click here to go read this article on that site now. They receive more than 10 million unique readers each and every month… and YOUR read, heart, share and comment could impact who else reads my words.

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WHAT IF I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH?
How to Overcome this Painful Mantra from our Childhood.

So often I hear individuals, my readers, those who become my amazing clients ask, What if I’m not good enough?

It could be in a conversation about starting a business, going on a date, leaving the job they’ve had for a few decades to do something new that lights them up… 

The what doesn’t matter… 

What does matter is this common thread, theme, way of thinking about ourselves, naturally, that is literally the true pandemic of our time. 

What if I am not enough?

Imagine if your children, grandchildren, the child down the street never-ever asked that question of his or herself. 

Because this is not a gender specific question, but one that penetrates the lives of all colors, all creeds, all religious, all social circles, all socio-economic demographics and spreads like a virus internally faster than 5G WiFi. 

What if I’m not good enough?

Take a beat and get quiet with your fabulous self. 

Has this been a thought in your mind? 

A repetitive belief question that demands your attention stronger than a siren’s call on a rocky shore?

For most, that is a yes and it’s the one thing in life that keeps them from their dreams. 

And for some, this one repetitive thought keeps them from even dreaming. Period. Because why bother?!

Imagine if it didn’t have to be this way… because it doesn’t but before we chat on that, let’s dive into what this is costing you if you can relate to that little whisper inside…

What if I’m not enough?

What specifically do you not dream up, start, do in your life because this question plays on repeat in your head? 

If you’re like so many you start something, a new project, passion, job or maybe even a new relationship with excitement. 

With so much JOY that you all but skip as you move toward it. 

And then something shifts. 

It could be triggered by a sideways look, a comment tossed out by someone who matters not or a lot and suddenly your skipping is tripped up by the sinking pit in your gut. 

What if I’m not good enough?

Now when you glance around, 
sun still shining bright, 
You feel the eyes of others
Everywhere.

Eyes that could be 
judging, 
critiquing, 
criticizing... 

If you’re like so many, you become paralyzed by fear… 
And those mudslide thoughts begin...

Not good enough.
What if I fail?
What will they think?

You may even wonder if that random guy reading the newspaper at a local cafe, the older man you pass by everyday, is judging you as you hurry on, shoulders hunched, head down…  

Just that one thought of What if I’m not good enough? can send off a chain reaction that yanks you back...

Halts your skip
Tanks your mood
Allows you to sabotage any success you were about to enjoy.

When you allow that thought —

What if I’m not good enough? 

— to take up residence in your mind, it travels the superhighway of you to penetrate each cell of your body and doesn’t just have a devastating effect on your mood, your actions today… 

But compounds over time… as perhaps you already feel and know intimately. 

For so many What if I’m not good enough? started as a mantra in childhood and has been a repetitive pattern that allowed the go-cart of life to become a start-stop madness that’s kept you from the very things you said you wanted. 

Now is the time to say enough! 
To stop this insanity
To park that go-cart of you in the Kiddie Lane of your past 
And build a new ship forward. 

Imagine what would be possible if you pushed aside that thought What if I’m not good enough? as easily as windshield wipers cleared away torrential rain. 

What would be possible if you could see your path cleared, brilliantly, with the snap of your fingers so you could continue to skip down your day of excitement?

To dream big…
To live with JOY…
To see the stares of others and no longer care what’s behind it. 

Imagine being so free to be you that the thought
What if I’m not enough?
Never again took shape in you.
Never again was whispered by that voice within you.
Never was passed to your child, grandchild, neighbor’s child again.

What would be possible if you lived every single day knowing this one fact? 

I am enough. 

Read that again as it’s delicious. 

And when you’re ready for that way to make this possibility yours, all you have to do is flip the switch of you.

One step.
So simple we miss it.
We desperately want to complicate it.
To make it hard. 

Don’t. 

When you hear that thought What if I’m not enough? Or What if I’m not good enough? Flip it. 

What if you are? 

Your mind shouts (or whispers) What If I’m not enough? And your new answer, yep, start answering it with a thought or a whisper of your own so it can become your new mantra… 

What if I am?

And feel how that makes you feel… try it now. Close your eyes, take in a breath and whisper those words… What if I am enough?

Perhaps you feel nothing in this moment. 
Perhaps an internal brightening… a smile from within.

Both are perfect. Stay with it.
What if I am enough? 

Or make it even more specific…

What if I am good enough?

That is all you say on the daily, hourly… every minute. 

As that voice flows in, What if I’m not enough? relax and flow out with What if I am enough?

When you do this as religiously as brushing your teeth, the very ground under you will shift, your life will change and more JOY, possibilities and abundance will be yours.

Skipping through your day with a mile-wide JOYFul smile will be your new-constant norm… 

And who doesn’t want that?

If you know you have nothing to lose and so much to gain, put this into practice today. It’s literally life-changing when you do but you’re smart... so I’ll let you figure out for yourself just how powerful this one flip it with JOY tool is. 

If this resonated, share this message with another you feel it could benefit because we could all use more JOY in our lives.

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What’s More JOY Worth To You?

For Less Than 191 Pennies A Week
Access All My JOYful Words

For the detailed soul, click here for more.

---

Photo Credit: Felicia Buitenwerf @iamfelicia

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The Coloring Lines Of You

When you invest in more JOY...
you receive rewards

Not points or miles
to go somewhere...
someday.

Nope, I'm talking rewards like abundance in all areas of your life...

From wealth to health to relationships to the impact you make
and the mark you leave in this world.

Because the secret sauce of life lies in these three utterly simple words

Abundance Follows JOY

Mmm, delish, divine, and so insanely simply
you may be wanting to devour me with questions like

"But how?" or "What are the steps?" or a simple "Uh?"

And it's okay, Fabulous.

I was once there
looking to color between the lines
and now realize
when I allowed the lines to fall away
all shifted...

Allow that to sink in for a beat…

Those lines are the stories you’ve been told,
The lies you believe,
Because why wouldn’t you.

Those lines
are the you
you created to
people please
fit in
feel like you were enough
be heard
be seen
be understood.

Those lines you...
all live within
Until they don’t...
are a self-imposed trap.

The ways we
hide
tone it down
be what everyone else wants us to be.

It’s how we
Fit in
Find acceptance
Shrink
Become less than

More often than not.

Those lines leave us feeling
Chafed,
Raw,
Out of sorts

Until one day we bust free
With explosive force
And no path of understanding
All the muddled chaos
within.

Or retreat
Misunderstood
Yet again...

Going deeper and deeper
within
Yet another set of
Stories
Lines.
Beliefs
Lines.
Lies
Lines.

Some hide their light
Between those self-drawn lines.

Hunkering down
Down
Down.

Others flit to and fro,
Believing
once again
that a different type of line
Will be the answer
They seek.

From a protective circle
Creating the smallest of spaces
To hibernate

And wait.

To the child-like dance of a crayon
across a page
Already mapped out
A path
To follow
To play within
To work from

Yet ignored once again
To become
A maze of lines upon lies
a trap
Next to Impossible
to unwind.

Those lines are the rules and regulations,
The hierarchy of life
Of family
Of religion (perhaps)
Of being a part of
Something
Anything.

Pretty please,
Accept me.

A need
A desire
A right,
Damn it
To belong.

Even when it no longer serves you.

The you
dying
to break free.

The you
struggling
to breathe.

The you
Crying silently
Is there not more?
To me?
To life?
Than this?

I hear you.
I feel you.
I know you.
I see you.
I was once you.
And I can simply share this.
Three letters.
One word.

It may leave you cursing me.
It may leave you wanting to hug me tight.
It may be your time to hear
Or that may come in a fortnight.

J.O.Y.

You heard me right.
JOY is the answer
You seek.

Not another step by step
Color between my lines

Not another rule, story, lie
Of how to be you…

You already know how to be you…

So flip that pencil
Put that eraser to work
And start with one line,
The one story,
Belief,
Lie
You’ve been told
You’ve told yourself
And get your groove on.

Not with anger.
Not with fear.

Feel those
Don’t ignore
Negate
Disrespect
The feels.

Feel them flow in...
And allow them to float away.

Gently,
With ease.

Blown off the page of you
Like eraser dust
And edges of a line
now dulled
To be no more.

A line that
Served you
Protected you
Honored you
And yes, trapped you
Too.

Right where you needed to be
Until you were ready to see
the light.

Your light.

Erase with JOY
With ease
With delight
And all will unfold
Just as intended.

No right
No wrong
Just pure JOY.

Feel it..
A tingle
A chill
Erase some more
And allow it to build.

This is the way
Forward…

No more lines.

Just an ability to receive
More JOY
As you listen to the knowing within
That will tell you exactly what
Line
Lie
Story
Belief
Thought
Way of being
your meant to let go of
Next.

No need to ask.
No need to ponder.
No need to wonder.

Just be
Present
In JOY
In knowing
The need for more lines
Is now behind

And a blank slate of you
Now awaits.

Hmm, what will you
JOYfully
Create?

💜

Leave a comment and let me know.

---

What’s More JOY Worth To You?

For Less Than 191 Pennies A Week
Access All My JOYful Words

For the detailed soul, click here for more.

---

Ah, Writer’s Block, Not A Writer? I Betcha You Can Relate

There’s this thing called writer’s block. 

It’s that blank page, blank screen and a blinking cursor, taunting you, demanding you say something divine. Daring you to erupt greatness on the bare canvas of —

—What the f- am I even writing? 

It’s the thought that spins and takes over until all other words and coherence leave the being of you and all that remains is a puddle of —

—oh, sh*t!

And that’s when my phone rings, my email chimes, alarms go off. 

See I’m the writer who gets called in to save the proverbial word-day. I’m the one who steps in when a once-prolific writer crashes and starts a slow (or fast) burn. 

Perhaps due to the pressure of a deadline, meeting expectations on a follow-up book, or simply drawing a blank. 

When this happens, I put on my cape and transform into The Word Doctress. 

And I rise to the call with purple pen in hand like my chosen sword because I so get Writer’s Block but on a different level. 

Mine was the hiccup of Life Block. 

The what the f- am I even doing here? moments. That’s what I call Life Block.

Maybe you’ve experienced it.
Swam in its depths,
spun in it’s fast-cycle
and felt like you’ve all but disappeared into the quicksand of endless thoughts,
Could-have, would-have, should-haves
From the pressure the unknown exudes. 

It’s that thing that has you questioning in the dead of night... and the stark light of day...

Why am I here?
What is my purpose? 
Is there a reason for all this? 

Just like the writer asks...

What does my book even mean?
Why am I even writing it?
Who’s gonna read it?
What if it’s not as good as..?

As The Word Doctress, I step in and literally start waving my magic, purple ink like fairy dust, cut through the crap that is the blocked-writer’s-mind, and get to the root of their sh*t. 

And no, I don’t dress up in a cute-ass-white-lab-coat with lace garter belt and silk unmentionables underneath, but if it floats your boat to think about…who am I to stop your imagination. 

Because honestly, that’s all writing is... 
That’s all life is…
Imagination.

It’s taking words and creating a feeling.
It’s imagining something and then translating it onto the page for another to absorb -- or ignore. 

And being perfectly down with either-or. 

That’s how I see life. 

Some people will love what you do and some won’t.

When I step in to help out a fellow Word Wizard, the thing we end up working on is not their plot, their character and dialogue or their non-fiction topic. 

Nope, it’s much more important, vulnerable and basic. 

We talk life. 
Why they’re in their head. 
What’s got them scared and shaking in their proverbial boots?

Because frankly, what I’ve found is that Writer’s Block is really another version of Life Block.

So my role in that moment is not to save the day with my own words, but allow them to save themselves. 

I’m all but spitting out my cup-o-joe as I sit here overlooking the sea, just now realizing that I’ve been a Writing Coach to the Writers. 

Funny how we don’t see what’s so clearly in front of us.
Much like what happens for a writer at a sudden loss for words. 

The fact is I have been a coach to some very amazing writers who’ve stumbled on their word-path and simply needed a helping hand. 

We all need that at some point, do we not? 

I sure did — with my life block. 

So I get it. I feel into it. And I am able to shed light where needed, hold up a delicate mirror where helpful, and offer just the right key in the best moment to fit that sticky-lock that’s shut down one’s creative flow. 

Plus, I sprinkle a dash of JOY back into their writer-life because frankly, everyone needs more JOY.

Because, real writers, we write to write. Period. Full stop. 

We don’t write to be read. 
We don’t write for the numbers. 
We don’t even write for the impact our words may or may not have. 

No, we write because we can’t f-ing help it. 
Like for real. 

Me. Deserted island. Only three things. Endless supply of paper, ink and a waterproof room to house my words. Sorry, chocolate. 

Ooops, wonder if I can I bring the Fabulous Frenchman with his three can’t live without items as a bonus?

When a writer writes they get lost in the words, the characters and the story they are telling. And it matters not if it’s fiction or non. 

When a writer is in flow, time stands still and flies by all in the same moment. 
That’s being in the zone.

A place where there is no writer’s block nor life block. 

Because the words simply are. 

One simply allows. 

And from that place there is this delicious peace. 

This untapped joy.  

This delight is what’s possible. 

And when a writer is blocked. 

Well, they are no longer writing from that place that caused them to write in the first place. They have moved from their soul, their heart, their essence and being the conduit...into their head. 

To outcomes.
To profit.
To numbers.
To comparison.
To worry.
To judgment.
To fear.
To doubt.

And that writer, that person, no longer trusts the only thing that matters. 

Themselves. 

See when you’re in your head, you can’t imagine fully.

When you’re in your head, you can’t tap into that inner guidance we all have as a birthright. 

And writing, like life, is a gift. 

Writing is a gift… if you’re a writer, you can probably relate.

And life, this life, your life … if you’re not a writer but can relate, is very much a gift. 

It’s profound, precious and should be treasured, loved and cared for, but so often we take it for granted, brushing off the wins like crumbs off our lap from that fifth cookie stuffed in one’s mouth without full awareness. 

Been there done that. What about you? 

So, I’m picking up my mug-o-green-tea, curling up in my comfy spot because it’s time for you to now tell me all about you. 

Who are you? 

The writer stuck in Writer’s Block hell 

Maybe the writer who’s itching to start filling that blank screen but simply doesn’t know how, a block all it’s own!

Or a delicate soul so hearing my words - Life Block - resonate within your core. 

It’s time to raise your hand high and with a wave or delicately with the pose of a queen, and speak the language of you. 

What if your life.. was delicious.?

Gosh, makes me smile wide, what about you..? 

---

Photo Credit: Velizar Ivanov @lycan

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One Hour Does Have The Power To
Open Doors & Transform Your Life

When The Words Flow... A Dash Of JOY

I created something new. Yep, seriously prolific here. In between books, letters to written for a few fab clients this week and a My Words Your Day® Intensive Experience, I still find the juice to create.

It’s literally in my blood. And I’d like to share it with you.

Like most words, this idea and what followed simply flowed. So, instead of questioning, overthinking, analyzing “OMG, another idea!” I gave myself the moment to be free.

I sat back, cracked my knuckles (not really) and let the words rip!

And boy did they ever…

Which is perhaps why I so love to write.

I don’t judge my words.
I don’t worry about my words.
I don’t question if my words are good enough.
I don’t really care what happens with my words after I’m done…
I realize they are a gift.

A gift I hand off to the reader, my editor, my agent, a client and how they are received next, well, that’s none of my business.

Hmm, detachment is a beautiful thing when you get it.

And thankfully, with words, I’ve been blessed to realize I am but the conduit.

So I allow.

And this, poem and a special something-something, is one of the things that came to me just a few short days ago and now has taken on a life of its own. More on that life-of-it’s-own to come!

It’s a poem, short and sweet with a delicate punch which is how I tend to coach my clients.

I say it like it is, no matter what the forum.

As you read A Poem — A Dash Of JOY, I encourage you to consider that thing you do that’s simply natural, easy, and aligned.

For me it’s words.
For me it’s teaching and coaching too.
But that came after doing and doing and more doing.

Competence breeds confidence.
Consistency breeds mastery.

So look to those things or that one thing you can do without question.

For me, it’s writing.
The words, those are a gift.

I can’t even fully claim them as mine for they simply flow through me.

And that’s why I’ve always been able to detach from the outcome. The thinking and worrying over how they will affect you and effect you, the reader.

So lean in now.

Picture that one thing you do that’s simply natural, easy, and aligned.

If you know it and can all but taste it — good!
Lean in and do more of it…

Don’t have it yet..? No worries. It’s there for you.
Allow it to come and it will when you let go of wanting to know now.

Seriously…
When we allow, all works.
When aligned, life is sweet.

Lean into what’s easy. I am and all is blooming. It’s actually pretty magical.

So that poem I mentioned is below is a sharing of what came from allowing this idea to be…

---

A Poem —
A Dash Of JOY

A Dash of this

A Dash of that

A Splash of

Hmmm,

Delicious Delight

A Dash Of Joy

When you

Rise Or Reside

Give it

A Toss

Lean in

Just right.

Remember,

Shaken Not Stirred

Guaranteed a

Fabulous

Good-Night.

A Dash Of Joy

A laugh or two

Give it a go.

It might just be good for you.

My name is Jill

Or should I say JOY

For it bubbles from within

And spills out through my purple pen.

Hear me word-roar…

This is where we meet

Clandestine

Entwined

The Dash In Between

So perfectly designed.

And dare I say…

divine.

Storyteller am I

So start at the one

Unless you desire

Mind-warping fun.

Matters not to me

Paint outside my lines.

I am but the sharer of the tale

You the receiver of all I unveil.

Welcome to

A Dash Of Joy

There's More JOY To Be Found

So, I’m doing something crazy.

I’m posting videos
Of me
On Instagram.

For me that’s jump-out-of-a-plane crazy.

---

Okay, have to pause here and say

Dang, and I thought it was weird to put myself out there. To see my face and that’s interesting, is it not?

I live with my face each day and yet putting it out there, it’s super uncomfortable for this once hider. Maybe you can relate.

But back to my grid-filled-face… if you’re interested, do come press over on Instagram or simply keep reading and press play on Video 1 below.

Back to the idea of videos on IG being a bit cray-cray…

Not due to fear
Or even being judged so much.
Not any more, anyway…

But simply putting myself
And who I am out there.

Being vulnerable.
Exposed.

It’s like that dream so many of us have…
Walking naked onto the high school stage of your life
A nightmare you just can’t wake up from.
Can you relate?

Remind me to share that little ditty with you one day.
Not a high school moment for me
But exposed, for real, none the less…

Sharing for me was more of a who am I to do that, say that, be that?

Instead of asking the better question of Who Am I Not To?!

For it I don’t, someone else will…

And will they be as JOYful, impactful, in it to serve, as I am…

Who knows. Who cares.

All I know now is that
Who Am I Not To?!
is a much better Q
to ask myself
when I don’t want to lean
into the uncomfortable.

Try it and see how it feels…

Because my answer to that Q is a Hail-Mary Duh.
It’s an end-all to the excuses
And a b-all in with living this life full out.

Full Stop.

And I’ve retired the old stories of struggle I once tight-fisted.

And damn it feels good.

It’s like I recently said to a coaching client of mine, when he (finally) saw just how stuck he was in his old patterns, those he’d previously identified but fallen back into repeating.

“Are you tired yet of your old-ass-ways or not?”

When you can answer that with a Hell, yeah!
something shifts within
and a new you is left to bloom.

So, right now, I’m blooming.

And I’m sharing an easy way to access all the current videos, if you so desire to press play and discover more about JOY… and well, me.

I promise you’ll laugh, giggle and perhaps even snort while also taking away a nugget of wisdom or two.

Press Play On Day 1 of This Journey Into JOY now…
Then come join me on Instagram today to get immediate access to all.

---

I’m looking to up my IG number to 500 this month.

Might not sound like much in this day and age, and in the grand scheme of things it’s not… However, considering I was just at ZERO, ZILCH, ZIP… it’s celebration worthy.

And it’s my now-goal which you can help me achieve.

Join me on this amazing JOYful Journey!

Share, like and help me spread more JOY… you you dare.

---

What’s More JOY Worth To You?

For Less Than 191 Pennies A Week
Access All My JOYful Words

For the detailed soul, click here for more.

The Power Of One Little Word Can Change Your Life

This title is actually a bit deceiving, so forgive me for roping you in. But this message is SO important that when you get it your life will change. And your vocabulary too.

See I want to share with you one three letter word that is incredibly disempowering.

So much so, that it may be the very thing keeping you stuck, trapped, spinning, wondering why the heck you can’t seem to get anything done, right or be understood.

I won’t give away the word, for that, you must press play, but here’s what I know.

In four minutes, all will shift for you.

Just four minutes.

If you dare, press play now. Then leave a comment below with your ah-ha moment.

---

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There’s no denying the power of words after that demonstration, is there?

If you agree, share a comment below on just how this message impacted you, give this post a heart and share it with one person today. Isn’t this message worth passing to someone you care about today..?

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One Hour Does Have The Power To
Open Doors & Transform Your Life

Who Am I? The Answer.

If you missed part one, The Inspiration, behind my answer, then you may wish to revisit that here before diving in.

Below is me in a riff moment.
A moment of self-reflection where I allowed the answer to come to the subtle and all important Question.

Who Am I?

See if you can’t answer those three little words without
wanting to please another,
without wanting to be right,
get it right,
not offend
not be judged…

Do you even know yourself at all?

Short answer is hell-to-the-no..

Let go of all the bullsh*t and baggage. It’s heavy and you’ve been strapped to it long enough.

Spend a moment today, after you read this, and ask yourself that those three-very-loaded words.

Who Am I?

When you do,
from absolute truth,
you can accomplish so much.

Dive in with me as I share vulnerably The Answer to this question.

I can because, friend, I do not give two-sh*ts if you love it, hate it, like me, hate me or feel offended by my words.

We each have free will and yours involves joining me on this path or clicking away.

How much balls would it take for you to publicly say the same?

When you do, you attract those who are meant for you.

You. The you still here, dying to read my answer to the all important question that makes life easy, all possible and everything that much more delicious.

Who Am I? The Answer.

For me.

I am a sensitive soul who is youthful yet tapped into something so much older, wiser, all-knowing than I. Don’t ask me to explain it, for I can not. And I no longer try nor do I question this knowing of…more.

I am a JOYful being who stands lovingly planted in her own word-driven spotlight, not from a place of ego… From a place of responsibility, dedication, determination, and dharma. 

I am a passionate, fiercely-loyal, deliciously-generous soul who knows that giving to others is life-sustaining on a level most can not fathom. 

I am an observer, a storyteller, a word-wizard who allows the stories that need to be told, the messages that need to be heard, to flow through me. 

I am the conduit for what comes pouring onto the paper and ends up on bookshelves, both digital and wooden, around the world.

I am often scared shitless, but pull up my big-girl panties and I do the thing anyway. For when I do, I am being committed, self-integral, brave, bold, powerful, and true to myself. 

I am learning that less is more and to keep the drama that comes with this life out of my inner circle. I am welcoming of all and yet uphold boundaries that honor what’s most precious to me. 

I don’t give two-sh*ts about what others think and have stepped into a more daring way of being as I get to know and love myself unconditionally.

I strive to never judge, criticize or cast my beliefs on others, and honor each person on his or her own journey. 

I forgive more easily than ever and that fills my cup. 

I live from a place of everything is energy and all is 100% possible, 100% of the time. 

I am forever learning but no longer seeking. I know that the answers come in the space between. 

I am at peace with who I am in the world, as I know I am part of The All and uniquely me. 

I have a purpose greater than myself and lean into that when called, even when I can not define, understand or fathom it. 

I live from a space of not needing to know all the answers, ask all the questions or think my way through all-the-things. 

I know that “how” is none of my business and instead sink into allow-ing. 

I value silence and solitude as much as time spent with those I love. I protect both at all costs. 

I cherish those friendships that can be picked up as though no time has passed and anchor myself in only relationships that build and fulfill me. 

I compare myself with who I was yesterday, never copycat another, and work hard simply at knowing myself better than I did.

I show up daily knowing I am BEing the best version of myself in each moment. 

I practice the art of loving myself unconditionally every second and daringly commit to trying new things, stepping outside the box of my own comfort and am honored to show others the same path… usually through my words.  

I am a provider of options, paths and possibilities as a natural-born teacher, but do not drag anyone by the ear nor hair. I allow each his or her own journey, or not. And am okay with their choice. 

I take nothing personally and this is the constant work of being fully, deeply aligned, at peace, JOYful me. 

I am comfortable in my own skin and knowing that my growth, my transformation, my evolution, me is a work in progress. One that never ends. 

I am flirtatious, smile often and have a quick wit. I enjoy engaging with those who can keep up, know themselves and have something of value to say.

I am supported in all areas of my life and need not see all the steps laid out before me to trust and know I am good. 

I am an edifier, an encourager, an educator. My greatest desire and reward is for all paths I cross to be left feeling better than before I entered their life. 

I live from a place of “people remember how you make them feel” and strive to honor each person on his or her journey, to coach only when hired, and to allow others to rest where they are...even if that involves them marinating in their own suffering. 

I am a deep feeler yet know now that being a true empath does not involve sinking into another’s misery but allowing and honoring them to move through it themselves. 

I take nothing personally and yet will defend myself, those I love and what I know to be best for me.

I am a lover of creatures, big and small, and believe they share so much wisdom when we open our eyes and remove the veil. 

I bond with children instantly, don’t ask me why, and love to dance, sing and act a bit crazy.
I can carry a tune, sometimes. 

I cook without measuring a damn thing, because sometimes rules, like grammar, are meant to be broken. 

I am a rebel in my own sweet-as-pie way and can be a bossy-bad-ass bitch when needed yet am motivated from a place of utter love. 

I know that laughter is medicine for the soul and movement, medicine for body, so I engage in both daily. 

As the thinker of my thoughts, I choose carefully each and every thought I focus on and work diligently to harbor only those thoughts that serve me, better me, and honor my growth. 

I go after what I desire in this life with passion, with purpose, with precision and I listen to my inner knowing as it gets me to exactly where I am meant to be. 

I am so very comfortable in my own skin and can honestly say “I love myself”...

Can you?

Let me know in a comment below.
And if you feel daring, grab a journal or open a Google Doc and answer that question for yourself.
Who Am I?

This is helpful in so many more ways than just getting to know yourself.
This is the magic ingredient to your life, your business, your success.

What if all your messaging,
how you communicated…
everything that is you,
embodies how you answer this question?

Give that a ponder as there’s much to receive here if you are open…

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Photo Credit: Alexandru Zdrobău @alexandruz

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Who Am I? The Inspiration.

2020 has been a year for the record books, has it not?
In more ways than one…

And for me, this year,
along with all the sh*t,
has been an amazing year
of meeting truly rockstar women.

Women who embody a way of being that was so unfamiliar to me,
yet so very magically-right.

Not expecting that…now were you?

But do we need more talk of pandemics and politics when in reality our relationships and how we make each other feel each and every moment is what truly matters.

Sink into that for a moment.

I live by this one quote of the amazing poet and woman, Maya Angelou, who once said

”I've learned that people will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

If that’s not some foot-stomping truth to you, then stop reading now as you won’t like what comes next.

See for me women, in general, never left me feeling real good about myself.

I have an old story around woman.

A story that involves jealous, back-stabbing b*tchiness.

A catty-competitive streak that simply turned me off to making a go at deep-sharing and friendships with the same sex.

I saw this young in life,
in my own family dynamic.
And I never understood it.
Never liked how it made me feel.

I always observed the behavior of these women,
adults to my childish innocence,
like a mad-scientist observes a lab-rat
through thin, steel bars.

To say this experiment — I mean, experience —
with the majority of woman I met
early on in my life
left me feeling hollow,
different…

A spectator in a game I simply refused to play,
even if I’d known how,
would be a gross understatement.

So I backed away, secretly harboring a desire to unearth what I knew was missing.

Real women,
unafraid of each other’s successes,
eager to celebrate one another.

That couldn’t be just a myth in my magically-creative mind, could it?

Yet, this year has introduced me to a new breed of woman.
And proved that magic does exist.

A flock of sisters,
of goddesses,
of powerful female beings
who need not stand on the shoulders of another to know who they are.

Who need not smile — forward-facing
while back-stabbing you,
with a dip and a twist,
the moment your profile is in sight.

A cluster of woman
who support, uplift and desire nothing
but the other’s greatness.

To say it’s been rewarding…
would be an understatement.

To say I wasn’t cautious — at first,
would be a lie.

To say I don’t still blink in awe
at the bonds developing,
the trust felt,
would be a giggle.
A gas.

To say I am not loving
this new-found family,
who only want each other to shine,
would be a crime.

So, without further wordiness on my part, I want to share this.

When you meet a woman
who knows herself.

Her worth
Her value
As a human being.

Not based on her doing-ness
but simply who she is being at her core.
It’s a glorious thing.

When you meet a woman not swayed by society’s standards and the norms that typically box both sexes in, something magical unfolds.

An opening for you to embrace the same knowing within you.
At least that’s what took place for me.

An awakening to see that it’s so not about people pleasing all,
but standing firm in the pleasing of yourself.

And damn if that ain’t hot.

To shed the should haves, would haves, could haves.
To let go of who others want you to be, expect you to be…
Who you’ve trained them you will be…
And to step fully into the skin of you.

A skin that may feel stretched thin
Or fresh and smooth like a new-borns
as you answer the most important of all questions.

A question most women stumble over
never get right,
until they stop trying…

Who Am I?

When you pause in answering that Q like a true-false quiz
and sink into the answer,
only for yourself,
the words come.

As a beat,
A steady drip,
An all-knowing tidal-wave…
It matters not.

All I know is that in answering this question, with a new found appreciation that I am not a lone-woman…

But blazing the trail of me,
supported and rooted,
cheered on
by amazing estrogen-flooded sisters,
Something within me
opened free.

And all it took was one more bad-ass woman in my sphere.

An Irish lass, who cares not what others think of her.

A woman who is daring,
brass,
and bold as f*ck.

A woman who knows her positives and her negatives and is not afraid to own either — for you can’t have one without the other, now can you?

A woman who happens to love that world as much as her drink…
and herself.

Yep, I said it.

She loves herself and that, friend, is where you too may have been steered wrong if you thought “ego” or “well…”

All starts with love of self.

I too was told that was so very wrong…

And I’m now calling bullsh*t
because, in truth,
it’s the only right thing there is.

This field of you
when fertilized with love,
becomes a place all can grow.

If you are a JOY-Subscriber, you can dive in here now.

This is where I share The Answer, my answer, to this question so few ask of themselves. That so few are able to answer honestly, for themselves.

And hey, I get it because before just one hour with this bad-ass, fearless woman, and taking a beat, I too would have answered this question with others in mind first.

Who Am I? The Answer.

Not yet a JOY-Subscriber?

Well, it’s a shame for there is so much word-play for those inside my Circle of Joy, words that uplift, words that resonate, words that make one think and words that make one feel…

You can get a sneak peek of those words here and then check out just what being a JOY-Subscriber looks like, because, let’s face it…

We could all use more JOY at this time, could we not?

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Photo Credit: Alexander Krivitskiy @krivitskiy

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What’s More JOY Worth To You?

For Less Than 191 Pennies A Week
Access All My JOYful Words

For the detailed soul, click here for more.

Your Factory Default Setting Is Not Miserable, Scared, Fearful But…

We all have a “factory-default-setting”... a way of being that many of us lose sight of over time. 

We often become disconnected
from our own inner knowing,
our truth,
either because we aim to please,
feel we are not enough,
believe we are broken. 

Here’s the Universal Truth.
You are not broken,
you are not lacking,
you are made perfectly imperfect
just the way you are. 

To say anything different is like b*tch-slapping the Universe, is it not?

I now come from a space,
a place,
a way of being
where JOY is possible.

And with JOY present,
anything and everything
is possible. 

Imagine living from that space, place.

Imagine waking up each day with utter,
delicious,
spine-tingling JOY.

Imagine knowing you got this, whatever THIS is.
And not only do you “got it”
you rock it…

Because of who you show up BEING.

My first way of being is JOY.
And several years ago,
I’d lost it.
I’d negated it.
And my life suffered because of it.

You’ll hear more about this
in The JOY Magazine.
But for now,
simply know
EVERYTHING IS ENERGY.

So what energy do you bring to the table of life?
to your life?
to your work?
to your self care?
to your bank account?

I live by what I call a Cosmic Truth.
Abundance Follows JOY.

And when you CATCH this,
not just GET it,
doors will swing wide
and ALL will literally flow to you.

This is when you step back
are finally able to stop
pushing on the pull door of life.

So if you want more abundance in your life,
in any area…
from health to wealth
to relationships to self love,
the place to start is, yep,
JOY.  

I’m an expert at using words to shine a light 
that may just enable you to SEE, 
to FEEL, 
to come home to your own unique truth.

I’ve been coaching creatives,
visionaries,
writers,
publishing executives
(many who secretly dream of being the inspired artist)
for nearly two decades.

And like all ‘good’ things in my life,
from writing to coaching to teaching to earning money,
to healing my body and even meeting my Frenchman,
I fell into those roles by accident. 

Yet, what I recognize now, is that I “fell” into nothing.
Nothing was accidental,
as I believed. 

I saw life through this filter of chance
because I did not feel worthy of receiving…
Thus, it had to be a fluke when things in my life actually worked, right?!

Nothing is chance.
Life simply works when I get out of my own way.
When I get out of my own head.
When I tap into the magic that is me.
A magic that lives within each of us.

I’m a word lover.
Words ARE my SuperPower as you will come to see.
(If you haven’t already 😉)

Stories impact us. Period.
And our stories shape who we are…
in a positive way
or in a way that keeps us trapped,
miserable,
spinning.

I had boat loads of stories,
a noose around my neck,
an anchor around my ankles.
Forever pulled apart,
Until I literally felt like a tightly knotted rope,
fraying from the middle…
inside out.

Our stories build us up
or tear us down.

And diving into them,
without stewing in them…
Without sinking into them 
and creating a rich broth 
that boils for hours, days, weeks
(for some of you even years),
is part of this life. 

I perfected the art of hiding in plain sight
Even as I published 33 bestsellers to date.
For myself and for others.

(Gasp, as this is maybe the fourth time I have said this out loud — ever!)

I perfected the art of being ‘behind the scenes’
even as I wrote for the silver screen...
And this year, dabbled in writing songs…

I perfected the art of ghostwriting and loved it,
even as it kept me chained in isolation.

And nope, my pseudonyms are locked down and these lips are sealed.
Because that’s how I designed my life, 
Up till now.

Like a spider, I created an intricate web,
Well many, to be fair.
I wrapped my wins up in sticky cobwebs to save and savor… 
Solo.

I created delicate strands of magic
To shine and glisten in someone else’s limelight 
And never celebrated me
Never received.

See my life was so focused on my failures,
Failures I felt were so massive and numerous they negated any potential wins. 

And the bottom line reason for this lack of acknowledgement
A deep rooted hatred of me.

A lack of self love,
I didn’t fully know existed,
just under the surface of me.

A turbulent rip-tide,
Affecting everything
Tossing, turning and pulling me under
at every opportunity. 

I designed the perfect, delicate, intricate web
to maintain my identity as a hider.
To stay hidden. 

Did you HEAR that?
Back that line up if you missed it…

I designed my life. Period.

You design your life.
See, the life you currently have is co-created by you. 
Full stop.

And when you get this, and let go of the disbelief, 
and see the power of understanding that
you co-create
THE ALL
that is you. 

And come to know the GIFT that knowledge is…
Without blame,
Shame,
Anger,
Resentment…

But instead with love,
acceptance,
forgiveness,
gratitude
and so much flipping JOY…
All will shift.

For it means you can co-create your life to look any damn way you please,
can you not?

So, what do you want? 

My Frenchman used to ask me that question,
when I was so bloody depressed,
riddled with anxiety, even though I didn’t know it... 

Filled with dis-ease that was literally making me sick…
And spinning in over-thinking,
over-achieving,
over-doing land
Forever seeking something
always just out of reach. 

I had to ask myself
was it was I even wanted...

The answer is surprising and I wrote about it right here.

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Photo Credit: Sam Manns @sammanns94

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One Hour Does Have The Power To
Open Doors & Transform Your Life

Conduit For JOY

So, what do you want? 

My Frenchman used to ask me that question, 
when I was so bloody depressed, 
riddled with anxiety, 
even though I didn’t know it... 

Filled with dis-ease that was literally making me sick…
And spinning in over-thinking, 
over-achieving, 
over-doing land.

Forever seeking something that was always just out of reach. 

What do you want? 

He’d ask and my mouth would go dry. 
I wanted to rip my hair out and scream. 

Such a visceral, 
wanna throw-up in my mouth, 
reaction to that simple question 
because I’d spent my entire existence caretaking 
and being what everyone else wanted me to be… 
Hiding myself…

And to be me… 
I had no clue. 
I’d neglected me for, well, ever. 
Who was I even?

Only when I’d write my stories
in the dead of night,
or the early morning moments,
when it felt like all the little creatures
and judgy-watchful eyes were asleep
was I me.

A me who did word-play
A me who created strong characters
A me who was a rockstar in my chosen field,
behind the proverbial curtain of OZ…

But in my everyday life, I perfected the art of copycatting.

Being who I was expected to be.
Who others wanted me to be.

They never asked me to. I simply volunteered. 
And then became resentful when they weren’t praising me, 
Thanking me, 
Bowing down to the martyr that was me. 

I was a perfectionist of hiding all that was truly me.
So good at it I could not answer that simple four-word question.

What do I want?

So good at it that I couldn’t answer because I truly didn’t know. 
And there’s little JOY in not knowing.
Just as there’s no JOY in pushing to figure it out.
An answer to that question.

So if you’re wondering what you want
If you’re searching for your purpose
Your dharma. 
Your calling.

Because so many well-meaning figures tell you to live
Your Truth.
Rock Your Purpose.
Do What You Love.

If you’re on the prowl for answers 
Seeking that thing just out of reach
That unknown that should be there, right?

Stop.
It pauses.
Enough now.

It can not be found in the struggle of your daylight.
It can not be created through force.
It can not succeed without JOYful flow. 

When in force
There is little air
When in force
There is no beating heart.
When in force
You’re in your f*cking head.

So STOP it. 
Jump off that head-tripping-train 
And sink into the key to all that you need to know.

JOY.

What if your purpose doesn’t bring happiness to you.
What if you bring happiness to your dharma.

Don’t know what that even means?

When you find your JOY
All you seek arrives.

When you find your happy,
Not from doing 
But from BEing present with you.
Silent with your-fab-self. 

Well, that’s when the heavens part
The angels sing
And the divine gifts that you already have will be known.

Okay, angels might not sing… But in my movie-mind I could see it unfolding like
Titanic moment.
Epic. 
Because it is.
Epic. 

When you get quiet…
When you lean into you.
When you stop stalking life like a caged lion… 
And allow your inner roar some room to be heard.

The all-knowing purr of happiness is within
Right
This
Second.

It’s not outside you
Not in these words
Or a book
Film
Or TED Talk.

Those are simply conduits.

My words are the flow you may need to allow you to hit rewind on your bad-ass-busy self and take your hand off the search bar of life.

You can’t Google your purpose. 
But you can discover it.
Within.

I already lead you to the word-path
And its three simple letters.

Missed it?

Here it is again.

JOY. 

Be bold. 
Discover it and all will unfold.

And I’ll do a happy dance to celebrate you
Minus an “I told you so!”

💜

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Photo Credit: Jonathan Sebastiao @jsebastiao

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One Hour Does Have The Power To
Open Doors & Transform Your Life