Becoming Your Alter Ego
Perhaps I took the whole alter ego thing a bit too far.
My Frenchman has always said I tend to rock extremes and I was like — nah. But, it’s hmm-worthy when I press pause and look at my life.
I have a great life. Which you can read more on right here.
Two years ago I didn’t feel that way. I thought my life sucked, even though from the outside, looking in, there wasn’t much wrong.
What was wrong was my depressed state, my unhappiness in the face of so many blessings and an inability to figure out why I felt so off.
When I realized why wasn’t the best question to ask and started to shift my attention elsewhere, the dark clouds of my mind were able to part just enough that a sliver of sunlight peeked through.
The journey back to my natural state of JOY was rather quick, considering I’d been locked up in despair-land for several years.
My turn-around had much to do with finding the ‘right’ mentor and guide who all but told me to STOP IT and so much...less.
Hmm, food for thought with that last word, am I right?
Nope, it’s not a typo, my lovely perfectionist friend.
I put the word ‘right’ in quotes because now I know that there is no right and no wrong, yet there is the old saying that when the student is ready the teacher will arrive.
And that’s what was just right about this path I found, actually stalked…
But I digress…for I want to share with you the importance an alter ego can play in one’s life and how, perhaps, taking it to extremes the way I implemented my alter egos, yep plural, served me and at the same time held me back.
First, one may wish to understand the purpose of an alter ego.
Creating an alter ego can be a way to get from who you are now (version 1.0) to your new 2.0 version of yourself and who you want to become.
It can be about wrapping yourself in a persona now that allows you to be this new being you say you wish to be.
For others, like Beyonce and her alter ego, Sasha Fierce, and most in the spotlight, it can be a separation of who one is in everyday life, and who they become on a very public stage of life.
There is something powerful in the creation of an alter ego and my friend, colleague and coach, Lisa Carpenter, goes into it in this episode of her weekly podcast.
For me, the creation of an alter ego started young and it was a way to separate myself, protect myself and create a way to freely express myself.
And it was a way to hide
from attention,
from praise,
from judgement.
From all.
My first alter ego was a pen name I created, that shall not be revealed, so no emails demanding to know please.
It was under this alter ego that I published my first article in a leading men’s magazine. I was 17 and yes, I said men’s mag.
Get your mind out of the gutter! Hmm, okay, you may dip a toe in.
I readily admit, I lied, and said I was 18 years old, as you had to be 18, at that time, to publish.
I never understood these arbitrary rules of 16 to open a checking account, with parental permission of course, 18 to vote, 21 to drink, yet 16 to drive a car, which without care, was a bit dangerous.
To me this justified my little white lie, but I still felt guilty about it for years — okay, decades!
But I digress, as that’s what the mind of a writer tends to do.
And I knew I was a writer at age 11, when my third 5th grade teacher that year, as I moved from Florida to Washington State to New Hampshire by January — long story — took me by the hand when I entered his classroom for the very first time.
He led me to his desk, pointed to his seat and when I was comfy, though terrified, thinking I was already in trouble, said, “Tell me your story.”
I can still feel the frown, deeply etched on my face, but I was a “good” girl so opened my mouth to say something when he again pointed.
This time my eyes landed on the stack of lined paper and the pencil placed neatly before me on his desk.
“Write your story.”
How he knew to say those words to me, I’ll never know. But, hmm, that’s proof of magic, because those words literally changed the course of my life. Forever.
As did writing my first 100-page story in 6th grade which you can read about here.
Yet, as me, I lacked confidence.
As me, I lacked a deep knowing that I was good enough.
As me, I didn’t comprehend that I was lovable.
And without that solid foundation, without the ability to believe in me at that time, I knew somehow to protect my words at all costs.
I knew somehow that to write anything other than school papers and the occasional journal post in my private diary was a no-go.
Meaning, I’d be crushed at the feedback, both good and bad.
Meaning, I knew deeply that my words were greater than me, more powerful than I and needed to be released into the world.
But, I was not ready for my slice of the spotlight.
(And that is a topic for another time, but one I find a lot of people can relate to.)
So I hid my talents behind characters I created, much like the fictional characters, within my mind, who came to life on the pages of my stories.
I used these creations, which I now see as alter egos, to propel me to greatness even as they protected, my then, fragile self.
And that’s what an alter ego is meant to do.
An alter ego boosts us, empowers us, shows up as a light on a hill that we can march toward and embody pieces of today.
For me, I became entangled in my alter egos, which is a bit of a different story… but in reality the creation of an alter ego is seeing the next version of you.
Imagine writing out this character that embodies qualities you love, desire, admire and aspire to become.
Imagine sinking into vivid detail on the way this person, this creation of you, shows up in the world…
Who this person is being?
How they — you — act..?
What you tolerate and no longer choose to accept…
How you stand in your power...
Perhaps physical traits...Like amazing health and strength…
Perhaps the ability to attract abundance in all areas of life
From wealth
To health
To relationships
Imagine sinking into the creation of a version of you, one you would love to embody…in the very near future.
90 days from now...
One year from now...
And enjoying the process of creating this future you.
Imagine sitting down a year from now, reading over this new version of you only to find — hot damn, it’s the you of today! And, even better, the you of now is so much more.
Why more? Because the you of now is aligned with your values.
Imagine having completed this alter ego exercise for yourself and then filing it away…
Never once looking at it again for those 365 days…
If you want to know just how to create an alter ego and become her...
That right there is the secret magical way to ensure that YOU step fully into embodying, embracing and becoming your alter ego.
The act of letting go, trusting the process, being the one you wrote about in every cell of your body… That is the work.
That is the magical way of being.
It leads to a Holy Shit That’s Now Me moment.
That’s the power of you designing an alter ego you literally step into over-time.
It might be stepping into your alter ego daily, with purpose, like Lady Gaga does, as that’s not her real name, yo!
Or it may be when taking the stage like Beyonce literally becomes Sasha Fierce for a performance.
Or it could be doing tasks like publishing words, a podcast or creating your art in some other manner and releasing it under that alter ego or pseudonym…as I did.
Like Manifestation Babe…(@manifestionbabe) have you heard of her?
She’s smart as a whip and has built a multi-million dollar brand in a seriously short time, under what some would consider an alter ego. However, I’ve yet to ask her if she sees it like that. Others would consider that her brand.
What if it is both? A brand and an alter ego.
This last was my path for most of my life.
Showing up as an alter ego.
With words… absolutely.
With Education Lady, a brand I created to provide myself some distance, while teaching and going online for the first time, acted more as a brand but also as a role — an alter ego who was more professional than my JOYful, fun-loving, sometimes foul-mouthed self.
And both served me. And others, as you can see here in an example of a universal alter ego.
I’ve also recently created an alter ego for this new public me, Jill R. Stevens, and the purpose of this site. Hmm, and that, my friend, is reserved for my inner circle!
This is the next version of me, who is stepping into the sunlight, more publicly than ever before, comfortable in her own skin and here to make an impact through leading her way.
My way.
Creating my alter ego self to step out as me for the first time is so very powerful.
And I’d like to show you just how powerful and quickly the words of my alter ego have come to be the new version of me…
And how they are a-changing…as you will soon see on this site…
Because as we become that alter ego, we get to play and create a new version.
Interested?
If you’d like a behind the scenes tour at how I create my alter ego and make her jump-off-the page powerfully, you’ll want to become a JOY-Subscriber.
[Already are, login now.]
See my JOY-Subscribers have access to my Alter Ego Masterclass (coming July 1st) where I dive into just how I created my pseudonyms, the names under which I write, and the alter ego I am stepping into embodying now, as a leader in my own slice of sunlight.
Plus, in this Alter Ego Masterclass, I dive into the steps you can take, the same ones I have used successfully over and over again.
And the magical ways you can lock in your powerful transformation to becoming her...(or him)…rather quickly, if you so choose.
See JOY-Subscribers as I like to call them, get access to all my words… including special editions, exercises and my processes for creating…
So right now you can become a JOY-Founder, one of my first members, and step inside to enjoy even more perks.
Your time is now.
Whether with me, or on your own, now is your time to pull out a sheet of paper or sit down with that open document and type out just who you desire to be…
While the creation of an alter ego is so much more than that, that’s a perfect place to start…
And starting TODAY is key. Imagine where your life will be 365 days from today — this moment — if you simply start.
Lean in and then lean hard, because what you create on paper will soon become the YOU whom you see in the mirror…
And that’s some JOYful fun I want for you…
Because creating your alter ego is literally a blank canvas of you and designing who you become with childlike abandon and a loss of all restraints.
Hmm, join me on the inside with your JOY-Subscription or join me for the Masterclass alone, as creating an Alter Ego is PLAYFUL FUN in motion and worth taking the time.
Leave a comment below and let me know you’re in! And share whether or not you’ve created your Alter Ego today…
Photo Credit: Ryoji Iwata @ryoji__iwata
