AYNI: How Living From The Law Of Reciprocity Changed My Life

There are certain principles in life that I have found, once learned, have shifted every-single-thing in my life.

The first was gratitude. And not just like making lists of thinks I’m thankful for, but really sinking into how it feels to be grateful.

The second was I AM Journaling. As a writer, I love this, but as a human being, it’s all but a requirement to live the most amazing life.

The third was discovering my path to true inner peace.

And the fourth, well, I want to share story time on this one today.

The fourth life-altering principle that changed everything for me was this little (but huge) thing called AYNI.

First, I must define AYNI, mustn’t I? Most people have no clue what this word even is, let alone how to spell it.

And, that was me, the first time I heard it mentioned.

AYNI is the law of reciprocity. 

I love this description from a site called Inka-World which you can read here. (Don’t worry, it will open in a new window so you won’t lose your place.)

Ayni describes the only commandment of the Inka religion that the Indians of the Andes know and keep until this day. This is a kind of cosmic law that is both part of everyday life as well as part of a supernatural order.

Ayni is a concept with many facets, which, simply put, amounts to the following: If you give something, you have the right to receive something. And when you receive something, you have the obligation to give something back.

Ayni describes a reality that seeks to remind people of their unique abilities as co-creators and transformers of their world. Ayni is about sharing so that everyone is provided with what he or she needs; it concerns the sharing of knowledge and wisdom so humanity may develop and harmony may be strengthened. It ultimately refers to a form of equality.

If it is applied in human relationships, groups, or systems, for example, Ayni can create an intentional force field that opens up the possibility for positive change, synchronicities or even miracles.

A detailed description of Ayni can be found on this website under Ayni – The force of reciprocity.

Credit: https://inka-world.com/en/glossary/en_ayni/

I’d read that a second time, as it’s powerful when you allow it to sink in.

See, when I started practicing AYNI as a way of beingness, well, things began to align like dominos on a scarred wooden table in the Little Havana heat.

I love watching little old men, wearing their hats, play dominos together with a passion that rivals a fight-to-the-death passion.

I think of AYNI as a WAVE. 

Much like a glorious blue-green wave on a Cuban beach.

Or the fragrant, tropical breeze felt but not seen with the human eye; the complexity of those liquid air molecules.

I think of myself (my thoughts, beliefs, feelings, intentions, etc.) as a WAVE OF POTENTIAL. 

Unlike that tropical wave or breeze, I have the untapped power to CHOOSE how to direct this WAVE.

Think about that for a moment.

A wave of potential.
Untapped power.
Choice.

Hmmm, sounds absolutely glorious. . .like a delicious chocolate lava cake just awaiting the slide of my fork into its gooey center and the eruption of sugary delight on the tip of my tongue.

But back to this untapped, powerful wave of potential and one’s ability to choose the direction of its flow.

Now in doing so, asserting choice, I am sending waves outward that are affecting others. Affecting everything on some or many levels. Most of them completely unknown to me.

Remember that point. Unknown.

Now the waves of potential, upon touching others, ripple. You’ve experienced this if you’ve tossed more than one rock in a pond or puddle of water. One stop and the ripple happens outward in a glorious circle outward.

Can you see it?

But, when you toss a second stone, before the first wave has dispersed, well, those two movements meet and create new joint-ripples. And a new pattern emerges, spreading outward and some also returning to the pitcher. You.

Imagine the endless possibilities. Of stones tossed and ripples created.

Now those stones are the thoughts, beliefs, feelings, and intentions every-single-human-being has.

Those get tossed like unseen rocks into the atmosphere of life.

And waves are created.

And when they meet other ripples from the waves of other people, new patterns emerge.

And some of those ripples return to the tosser of the stone - or thought, belief, feeling, and intention holder. Some of ripples from the energy you sent out and some from the output of another.

So, imagine if a stone is anger, tossed hard into the puddle of life.

There’s the impact, a splash and an instant effect, and there’s the lasting ripples that rock of anger ripples out.

Toss in a stone of love, and new ripples happen, some meeting that anger ripple and leveling it out.

Almost a cancelation of ripples.

But when there are infinite stones of feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and intentions being tossed each nano-second by an infinite number of human arms. . . well, that’s some powerful current created, is it not?

And to me it shows how interconnected we actually are.

We may not see these ripples, but we feel them. Powerfully.

So, what I have realized is how hard or soft one tosses out their stone in the shape of a feeling or thought greatly impacts the WAVES that are coming back to toward me from. . .

From that which I put out
From that which others around me put out

And even, from those — collectively — I don’t even know or have contact with.

And the RIPPLE effect I feel, receive, experience from those lapping ripples is intense, powerful and something I am discovering how to accept or reject.

This starts to touch one how much I tend to feel as an empathic individuals. And let’s just sum it up by saying this — I feel exponentially! Always have. Always will. It’s who I am.

And in discovering AYNI, inner peace and deepening gratitude, I now have new tools on how to protect myself, honor myself, and the ability to choose that which I allow in. I’m still a work in progress on this topic, but man, what a beautiful opening. But being an empath is a topic for another day.

Right here and now, I want to dive into the power of AYNI as it really is life-altering, once grasped.

Understanding the principle of AYNI, this is POWERFUL.
Knowing this FULLY, well, that’s the goal. . .
And as I said above, I’m still a work in progress... 

But today, I want to share a story of a deepening sense of knowing I am experiencing (read into that what you may) and how AYNI has begun to play an extremely important role in my everyday existence.

To do. . .[clearing of throat]. . . Let Story Time Begin

Recently I took an “AHH-ME Time Break” in Florida and mixed it with down-time and work. It was during my trip back to the islands, from the Florida Keys to Miami to St. Maarten, that things got interesting.

The engine purrs and almost demands I speed around the Grampa in front of me. I mean it is my last few minutes in this beauty. A rented Maserati, an upgrade at no extra charge...thank you. Universe.Yep, I like cars... 

But he’s cute, Grampa. His hands gripping 10 and 2, his silver head encased in a hat like my Gramps once wore.

So I don't. Race on. I simply drive my rented beast at ten miles an hour for my very last mile, and eventually hand her off to the rental agency.

It's been a crazy morning of traffic and accidents and heavy rain. A one-hour drive easily pushed past two because of rain showers and accidents on the Turnpike, but I’m good. 

I wave goodbye to Lisa, my check-out girl, and pat the hood of the glossy, black speed-demon I very much enjoyed driving the last few days... and I’m off, towing two suitcases, and balancing too much stuff.

The old me would have raced against the clock, cell phone in hand, constantly time-checking.

Jill 2.0 simply pressed play again to continue Jim Fortin’s podcast on inner peace (ha!) as I rolled my two bags inside without a care in the world.

Two escalators and a fun balancing act on one. . . 

Then a tram ride connecting the rental cars to the terminals gave me the time to change into sneakers from my Keys flip flops, have a quick smile and pleasant conversation with a gentleman. He was a cutie who thought he’d be able to bring onboard a bottle of delicious wine with his carry-on. His smile was charming, so. . . possibly?

As we parted ways, him helping me haul my suitcases off the tram first, I plugged back into my podcast and kept smiling.

Soon I wheeled up to the kiosk for baggage check-in. 

The first machine had a flare up mid-helping-me, so I realigned my bags and simply moved on to a new one.

No foot stomping, no muttering under my breath, no eye-roll to an airline employee or like-minded customer.

I simply smiled and with as much gracefulness as I could, weighed down as I was, moved to the next available machine while making faces at a cute baby in a stroller all but blocking my path. I easily managed because I chose to. 

I completed my transaction after 3 tries on the new machine, and experienced no hike in blood pressure.

The reward for my patience? No charge for my second checked bag. WIN!

I did pause for a moment to look at the very long line for checked-bag hand-off. 

But before the possibility of an old Jill 1.0 response like “Yeah, right” or a pissed-off time check could happen, an American Airlines employee was beside me asking, “Where ya headed?”

I shared my destination with a smile and asked if that was my line. 

“Oh, that’s not your line, honey. You’re down there.”

I was directed down the counter a bit. 

No line. 

No waiting. 

Bags taken. 

Not overweight. Really? Nope.

No extra charges because the kiosk forgot..? Nope.

Ahh, I CHOOSE to receive these gifts. And sent a ripple of thank you into the air conditioned atmosphere.

Jim’s podcast finishes as I move past one checkpoint to be waved to the pre-TSA line of two people. I sail right through and then the random thing happens.

An alarm. 

I start to pat myself down, thinking, “Oops.”

But the TSA agent says, “Random security check. Ma’am, wait right here,” and resets his counter.

Well, that’s never happened to me before.

Then he shouts over his shoulder, “FEMALE PAT DOWN!”

And well, I laugh, because that’s something you just don’t hear every day. 

His response to my unwitting, didn’t-realize-I-said-it-out-loud joke is “Unless you work in an airport.”

Carlos, the TSA shouter, and I chat it up about how many pat downs he averages in a shift.

We both watch as an older gentleman tries unsuccessfully to walk himself and two wiggling, adorable beasts through the scanner without setting off alarms. Ah, no luck times two.

I raise an eyebrow at Carlos and after his nod, I offer to help. I find myself holding a drop-kick-dog (said with love), getting licked to death by Pup One as the doggy-dad and Pup Two go through security.

I’m suddenly the dog wrangler and have Pup Two, the squirmer in my arms, as doggy-dad smiles at me, grabs Pup One and heads back through security.

I realize I still haven’t checked the time and have no clue if I’m cutting it close or good to keep getting puppy love. 

Not in my control, so I enjoy puppy time.

As my Frenchman would say, cheap entertainment, once it’s all said and done.

The ten-minute wait flies by with smiles, laughter, and people watching, plus some great Carlos stories of confiscated goodies (ice pick, anyone?!), without a tapping of my foot or an impatient thought.

Carlos apologized for the ten minute wait as I was led away. . . I smiled at him and wished him a pleasant day of repeating lines and confiscating goods while encouraging him to count how many pat downs were delivered on his shift.

I receive my friendly pat down from, um, Patty (no, didn't make that up) and chat about her 16-year-old who’s into dance.

Then I’m off to grab my bags that have been in everyone’s way, but no one seemed to mind, and finally enter the terminal to see that my gate is the last one all the way to the right…sweet, exercise!

Time check as the big wall clock is right in front of me. 12:15. I have just under an hour till take-off. 

How brilliant. After all that.

Now, you’d think the story ends there as the ripple effects of my good and at times helpful nature allowed me to receive no lines and free luggage check-in, while meeting nice people, but nope, it’s just starting. 

Even after my crazy drive into the airport of dodging accidents, traffic, heavy rain drops and crazy-ass drivers, while getting my groove on to the Transform Your Life From the Inside Out podcast interview with James Wedmore, I still had time to buy water, use the restroom, and gift a fabulous lady, Maggie, some of my Godiva.

Not because I didn’t want it. 

Not because I couldn’t have eaten it on my flight. 

Simply because I saw her. 

While others walked around her in the restroom, I stopped and said “hello” and “thank you”. 

I stopped and asked her if she liked chocolate. She did. So I gave her what I had. She accepted it with an amazed smile.

Basically, I saw her work, her heart, and stopped to acknowledge her. 

Plus, she looked like she could use it! I mean, what woman doesn't love chocolate…?!?

Then I book it to my gate, walk right onto the plane, and get settled in my seat beside an older man who’s wringing his hands with what I interpret to be nerves.

He reminds me of my own Grandfather, second time today, and the man I could have easily zoomed around earlier in my rented Maserati. 

I smile at him and ask if he minds flying.

“First time without my wife.”

I feel it, the WAVE of sadness but right then we’re interrupted. 

The same lady who checked me in comes to me and smiles, “Ms. Stevens, your upgrade is ready.”

[Side note: This always happens when I travel solo. Upgrades.]

I turn to the man with a gentle smile, introduce myself and wish him a good flight. I learn his name is Joseph. 

I move to my new seat, settle in and accept a glass of water (not OJ) from my adorable flight attendant, Freddy. 

I get comfy in my seat and go to sip when - BAM! My seat falls back and I take a refreshing bath.

I come up laughing, after I’m sure I admitted a startled squeal, and keep laughing at the horror on the cute flight attendant’s face.

Freddy rushes to right my seat. 

I’m up. BAM. I fall back. My glass is all but empty, my sweater damp, so I just hang on for the ride as my giggles become contagious for others all around me. 

Apparently, my seat is broken. And won’t stay up. We learn this the hard way — times three. 

Now it’s 12:35, our take off time of 12:05 has long-gone and maintenance is boarding. Not for my seat! For a luggage bin that won’t stay closed. A hazard.

I’m moved to an exit row of three empty seats by a motherly flight attendant who rushes to assist with a “Not the same, I’m so sorry.” 

But I’m perfectly fine and about to open my Florence Scovel Shinn again when Freddy’s back with an offer of wine and food, and all but a massage.

Ten minutes pass and we’re all still chilling, waiting for a word from the captain. I do have a connecting flight to my small island once in St Maarten. But I’m not worried.

All will be fine. It always is.

I look up from FloScovShinn to see Freddy’s wide grin and hear that I can move back to First Class. And it hits me.

A WAVE of crystal clear KNOWING.

I ask Freddy to lean down and whisper, “Can you give my seat to that older gentleman behind you in row 15? Middle seat? His name is Joseph.”

Freddy looks, wings up an eyebrow and says, “Um, sure but why?”

The words fly out of my mouth from somewhere beyond me. Another WAVE perhaps… 

“He’s alone. He just lost his wife, I think, or she’s not able to travel with him right now…” I pause and take a breath. “I think she passed recently. Anyway, he’s spent a good 50 or 60 years being taken care of and the last few months have been rough. He could stand some pampering from you today. Just not a bath.”

I smile as I watch Freddy take it all in. I pause, feeling the need to say more, something that’s on the tip of my tongue but seriously. . .

Then I just go for it. What the hell. When in flow, be the flow! “He always wanted a grandson.”

Freddy, hand-to-heart, goes all mushy and smiles widely at me before turning to walk a few rows down to the gentleman I met briefly.

I watch them converse and the man, gracefully, if a bit slowly, gets up and moves to the front of the plane. He looks a bit shocked, I see, as he gathers his hat and a book, but there’s a small smile on his thin lips.

I feel the hairs on my neck and look over my shoulder and across the aisle. A 40-something woman with flawless mocha skin smiles as me and stage whispers. “I saw what you just did.”

I smile, shrug (innocently) and turn back around to get comfy with my book. No biggie.

We take off one hour past normal departure and easily make up time.

Freddy comes to see me half way through the flight and reports, “Mr. J is so happy! He’s going to see his daughter. How did you know all that about him and his wife, Karen? She passed right before Christmas. So sad.”

I look at him and simply say, “We’re all connected.”

His frown turns to a wicked grin and he laughs boyishly. “I like you!” He whispers. “You’re my first witch!” Freddy turns on his glossy, black flat and saunters back up the aisle like it's his personal runway before I can do more than smile.

Work it, Freddy!

I’m smiling again at the thought that Freddy would rock heels better than I ever could, as I again feel the tingle. I look back and the woman has an eyebrow raised and chuckles under her breath before going back to her book. 

I glance at the title. “The Complete Works...” I kid you not. FloScovShinn, same book in my lap, different cover.

Ah hell, yeah, we’re ALL connected to each other through wave after wave after wave.

And what a wave of conversation Ms. Mocha (Monique) and I had as we deplaned an hour later and watch toward customs.

Monique and I parted ways with a smile, an exchange of numbers, and a few book recommendations each.

Joseph, I saw a bit later, was happily engulfed in a hug from a woman I assumed was his daughter while standing at the baggage carousel.

His air of sadness was just a wee bit less, and that made me smile. 

Life Lessons Learned on this ONE Day.

Be aware of this moment and no other moment, for this is the one, the only one that matters.

Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want in life. 

Don’t be too busy to stop and take stock of all that’s there for you...All that you have. Even when it doesn’t look like you thought it would, should, could.

Don’t be so unaware that you miss the opportunity for AYNI all around you - the art of giving. . .

And awareness that it’s more than okay to graciously receive that which you didn’t ask for…

For those are the ripples of your AYNI.

Because the universe (or whatever word you use) is ever-observing and mirroring back to you that which you send out in waves of energy, thoughts, feelings, actions, intentions. . .

And so much more.

---

If this post spoke to you, keep the conversation going below,
give it a heart and share it with someone today
who you believe may benefit reading it.

---

Photo Credit: Dawid Łabno @dawlab

---

What’s More JOY Worth To You?

For Less Than 191 Pennies A Week
Access All My JOYful Words

For the detailed soul, click here for more.